Beautiful Stories From Anonymous People

By Earwolf & Chris Gethard

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Subscribers: 3007
Reviews: 21
Episodes: 393

 Sep 11, 2022

 Mar 20, 2022

Chris S
 Feb 15, 2022
the most beautiful, honest, wonderful podcast that is. hands down my very favorite

 Jun 18, 2019

Bird G.
 Apr 24, 2019
I love this show!


1 phone call. 1 hour. No names. No holds barred. Thats the premise behind Beautiful Stories from Anonymous People, hosted by comedian Chris Gethard (the Chris Gethard Show, Broad City, This American Life, and one of Time Outs 10 best comedians of 2015). Every week, Chris opens the phone line to one anonymous caller, and he cant hang up first, no matter what. From shocking confessions and family secrets to philosophical discussions and shameless self-promotion, anything can and will happen! Theme song by Shellshag.

Episode Date
Murder Wedding (Live from Beaut/Con)

A former wedding planner tells the insane story of a murder that happened right before the ceremony. She also discusses runaway grooms and navigating feuding parents with a restraining order. Later on, she reveals a surprise connection to a previous caller which leads to a shocking confrontation at the live Beautiful/CONonymous recording in Brooklyn.

Jun 06, 2023
Outside the Box Psychologist

During Mental Health Awareness Month, Geth speaks with a 67-year-old psychologist about combating loneliness post 2020. She discusses working with clients aged 6 to 86 and the effects of the pandemic on teachers and students. She also reflects on what it was like seeing Chris’ Off-Broadway play the day after Trump got elected.

May 30, 2023
American Teenager in 2023

A high school senior speaks with Geth about going through the pandemic as a teenager. She discusses her fear of being in a school shooting and how disconnected she feels her generation is because of screens. She explains why she turned down UCLA and is instead pursuing a career in gymnastics. She also opens up about her mom's passing, feeling like an old soul as a result, and looking forward to a fresh start next year.

May 23, 2023
48-Year-Old Grandpa

A truck driver describes his wild past as a bass guitar player in a band. He discusses crazy near-death experiences including a moped accident that led to many broken bones and meeting his future wife. He also opens up to Geth about leaving the music scene when his son was born and how he felt when he found out his daughter tried pot.

May 16, 2023
Mommy On OnlyFans

A woman opens up about losing her mom to Fentanyl, the dark humor of her deathaversary falling on 4/20, and never doubting their bond despite her issues. She and Geth also unpack why she gets so many requests from twenty-something men on OnlyFans wanting her to play a mommy role. Later on, they discuss how she found her confidence after not having sex for 6 years and tips for directing a threesome.

May 09, 2023
Adult Baby/Diaper Lover

A man speaks with Geth about having this particular kink from a young age and how his parents reacted when they caught him with diapers. He explains the difference between ABDLs and age regression play and dispels harmful myths about his community. They also discuss the cloth diaper movement, “babyfurs,” and falling in love.

May 02, 2023
Ex-Husband Tried To Kill Me

A mother of 3 speaks with Geth about the best and worst year of her life. She opens up about separating from her toxic ex-husband, becoming a registered nurse, getting Meningitis, and falling in love with a mutual friend. She also describes the shocking confrontation that took place at her boyfriend’s house when her ex showed up with a gun. This episode contains a conversation about emotional abuse, gun violence, and suicidal ideation, so please keep that in mind if you decide to listen.

Apr 25, 2023
Hardcore Yo-Yo Enthusiast

Geth speaks with one of the world's biggest yo-yo fans about shady yo-yo people, competitive yo-yoing, and what his partner thinks of his extensive yo-yo collection. Chris also reacts to a video of a famous yo-yoer while the caller breaks down his most impressive moves. Later on, they discuss the beauty of embracing a hobby.

Apr 18, 2023
Curing Cancer in New Zealand

A Cuban expat tells Chris about her incredible journey from Cuba to New Zealand to work on cancer immunotherapies. She opens up about why she left her home country and how the George Floyd protests made her question her own place in the world as a black, Cuban woman. She also discusses the importance of not getting emotionally tied to her cancer research and describes how shaving her head and embracing her natural hair made her feel reborn.

Apr 11, 2023
Ugly Custody Battle

A father opens up to Geth about a years long custody battle over his son with his ex. He discusses their decision to co-habitat as platonic roommates for 4 years despite breaking up before their son was even born. He also explains how his use of Psilocybin for cluster headaches was used against him in court.

Apr 04, 2023
The Chill Priest

Catholic, but without the guilt. A priest discusses why the Episcopal church is often described as "Catholic-lite." He speaks with Geth about being pro LGBTQIA+, marrying another priest, and going to therapy. He also opens up about having doubts and explains why it's ok to keep questioning the faith.

Mar 28, 2023
Chris Gethard Presents: The Lonely Dad Conversations

Geth has a new book out called "The Lonely Dad Conversations," and you're about to hear a sneak peek! He sits down with some of his closest comrades for no-holds-barred conversations about transitioning to dad life.

You can get the whole book for free at

Mar 24, 2023
Jersey Italian Grandma

Kidnapping mobsters, a phone call from beyond the grave, and holy water in a vodka bottle. A Jersey Italian grandmother always has stories. She and Geth bond over Jersey Italian accents, Sunday dinners, and potatoes in a cup. She also describes her unique relationship with her ex-husband and shares her love of the Tour de France.

Mar 21, 2023
Punk Rock Lawyer

She considered herself a hardcore anarchist, until she became a lawyer. A tattooed, body building, sometimes musician discusses her journey to becoming an attorney. She shares wild stories with Geth about punching through glass doors, not fitting the lawyer stereotype, and changing her hard partying ways.

Mar 14, 2023
Lean, Mean, and Serene

A 62-year-old Mexican American woman pitches hosting the Spanish language version of Beautiful/Anonymous to Geth and explains why she wants to live to 120. She also discusses practicing Judaism and having a wild Bat Mitzvah in her forties. Later on, she opens up about how her eating disorder affected her relationship with her daughters. 

Mar 07, 2023
School Bus Mafia (Live from Phoenix)

What could a bunch of 10-year-olds do to make a bus aide quit after 20 minutes on the job? A teacher describes what happened when he was running his family's school bus company and an aide ditched the kids in Times Square. He opens up about leaving the family bus business and why it drove him to drink at Gogo bars by night. He and Geth also discuss the school bus mafia, best Jersey bars, and how one knows if they're a good person. 

Feb 28, 2023
My Dad Was An Axe Murderer

Imagine growing up with a secret so big, you had to change your name. A young man opens up about finding out that his father was an axe murderer. He describes what it was like meeting his dad for the first time in prison. He shares what happened when he realized that his college professor had picked up a hitchhiker that turned out to be his father. He and Geth also discuss America’s fascination with true crime and coming to terms with his trans identity.

Feb 21, 2023
Valentine's Day (Live from Sirius XM)

Naked at a Tai Chi retreat, online playing Counter-Strike, at karaoke, and the Home Depot. Geth learns the unexpected ways people have found love on this special Valentine’s Day episode. Live from Sirius XM in NYC, Chris speaks with callers about getting dumped, spicing things up with a bidet, what it’s like to date a party clown, and more.

Feb 14, 2023
Diarrhea In Burning Buildings (Live From Pittsburgh)

A former volunteer firefighter describes to Geth what happened when she needed to poop while a building was on fire. She also discusses her love of driving fast, the benefits of a good ass scratch, losing and gaining friends during her transition, and what makes a good dick pic.

Feb 07, 2023
Americanize My Accent

A 26-year-old social worker explains how she “Americanized” her Indian accent by watching “The Suite Life of Zack & Cody.” She opens up to Geth about assimilating to the U.S. and why her opinions on arranged marriage did not sit well with her parents. She also shares how undiagnosed Lyme disease led to her becoming immunocompromised.

Jan 31, 2023
Tales From A Timber Faller

Bears, mountain lions, and a lost pinky toe. A logger from Montana shares crazy stories about animal encounters, broken legs, and "Lucky one nutted Norm." He explains why his sons aren’t allowed to be loggers and educates Geth on the dangers of an Idaho jammer. He also discusses why after 41 years on the job and many injuries, he still can’t imagine retiring.

Jan 24, 2023
Dating 3 People At Once

Is it ok to date multiple people at the same time? A 25-year-old asks Geth to help her choose between 3 guys that are interested in her. She opens up about getting dumped, becoming a serial Hinge dater, and not wanting to hurt other people. They also discuss the importance of having fun while you're young and how to stop thinking so hard.

Jan 17, 2023
Sex As a New Mom

Between recovering from a difficult childbirth and taking care of an infant, sex is the last thing on this new mom's mind. Though weed helps get her get in the mood, she wonders if she's relying on it too much. She opens up about concerns over her husband's attitude towards fatherhood and feeling guilty for not having much sex since the birth. Later on, Geth reflects on his time as a dad and shares tips for new parents to stay sane.

Jan 10, 2023
2023 New Year’s Resolutions

Hike to the mesosphere. Be a better partner, but most importantly, stop being apologetic about your farts. New year's resolutions are serious business in 2023! Geth speaks with someone who's preparing a 5 minute clowning act, a woman who intends to complete an 18,000 piece puzzle, a college student addicted to collecting fountain pens, and resolutions from former callers.

Jan 03, 2023
Snoop Dogg Stole My Xbox (Live from Asheville)

A lighting console programmer describes starting his career on the set of Snoop Dogg’s “Hood of Horror” and moving on to work for Marvel and DC. He discusses the pressure to succeed in the film industry as a person of color who is on the spectrum. He also reveals to Geth how some lighting designers add Easter eggs into their films via lighting “morse code” including a scene in “Black Panther.”

Dec 27, 2022
Boujee Dirtbag

What's Kim Kardashian like? A 25-year-old shares wild stories about living and working in a boujee Colorado ski town teaching wealthy people (including Kim and Kanye) how to ski. She opens up about being the daughter of diplomats wondering if she'll move to Europe to be closer to her parents. She describes moving between worlds hanging out with billionaires by day and "dirtbag hippies" by night. She also explains why her father feels safer in Europe than he does in the U.S. as a black person.

Dec 20, 2022
Saving Feet, Saving Souls (Live from Durham)

If you heard a blood curdling scream, what would you do? A man tells the story of what he did for a stranger who severed his foot mowing the lawn. He also describes his annual camping trip where he invites 100+ people and doesn’t tell them where they’re going. Later on, he shares with Geth what his cat Santa taught him about love.

Dec 13, 2022
Fell In Love With My Therapist

What started as therapy turned into obsession and betrayal. A mother of 4 explains how her therapist manipulated her into thinking she was in love with him. She describes to Geth how he blurred the lines of their relationship with 8 hour sessions and drunken, late night voicemails. She also shares what happened after she reported him to the police and what investigators found when they showed up to his office.

Dec 06, 2022
Great Grandma Was A Serial Killer (Live From Chicago)

Rat poison, pill overdose, and tripping over a shotgun. A young woman describes the suspicious circumstances surrounding the deaths of her great grandma’s many husbands. She also opens up about overcoming a tumultuous childhood and what it’s like having 16 siblings. Later on, she reveals to Geth how she found love at IHOP and the dumbest way to get a concussion at a theme park.

Nov 29, 2022
Brain Surgery Changed My Boyfriend

They were planning their life together, but a traumatic brain injury changed everything. A woman shares what happened when her boyfriend woke up from brain surgery with a different personality and no memory of their relationship. She opens up about moving to a big city, becoming a DJ, and how in a way, they both became different people. Later on, she and Geth discuss getting sober, sexual compatibility post brain surgery, biking to Mexico, and the beauty of life now.

Nov 22, 2022
Gay Zombies (Live From Edinburgh)

A zombie fan explains to Geth why ‘Night of the Living Dead’ meant so much to him growing up as a closeted Mormon. He also shares his own dreams of writing a zombie movie and breaks down his favorite films in the genre. Later on, he opens up about processing religious trauma and how leaving the faith has changed his relationship with his family.

Nov 15, 2022
Let’s Talk About Grief

A 33-year-old reflects on losing her first love in Afghanistan at 18 and dating his best friend after the tragedy. She opens up to Geth about the mental and physical abuse she endured in the second relationship and the fallout it caused with friends and family. She also shares the surprising way she found closure after her boyfriend’s passing with a psychic medium.

Nov 08, 2022
The Putty Man (Live from Madison)

Just in time for Halloween, a 47-year-old horror fan shares the premise of the spooky novel she's writing. She and Geth get nostalgic over trick-or-treat traditions and she explains how scary movies help her cope with anxiety. Later on, they attempt to make contact with the ghost (aka "The Putty Man") that haunts Madison's Majestic Theater in front of the live audience.

Nov 01, 2022
Library Boy (Live from Cudahy)

Anonymous notes in the library and a will they/won’t they story spanning years. A woman shares the epic tale of her own “You’ve Got Mail” situation and what she learned from the experience. She explains how hiding letters in books turned into 8 months of back and forth with a mystery guy otherwise known as “library boy.” Geth and the live audience ask all your burning questions including, “what happened?!” Later on, she reveals the fate of her mystery man and why she’s happy now. 

Oct 25, 2022
From Slinging Bibles to Slinging Knives

What's easier to sell: God or knives? A father of 2 speaks to Geth about going from pastor life to selling knives out of a van. He explains why some ministers end up leaving and moving into sales. He also opens up about adultery in the church, getting into therapy, trying weed, and how his marriage improved after switching careers.

Oct 18, 2022
Could You Beat a Raccoon In a Fight? (Live from Edinburgh)

Chris speaks with a young woman about her psychic abilities, putting them to the test in front of the live audience. She explains her fascination with astrology TikTok and analyzes Geth's birth chart despite his skepticism. He presents some thought provoking questions about raccoons, favorite berries, and the existence of ghosts. Later on, she opens up about doing EMDR therapy and how it's benefitted her. 

Oct 11, 2022
Succeeding At Failure (Live from Edinburgh)

Chris speaks with a young woman who purposefully set herself up for a year of failure to develop a thicker skin. She shares her experiences trying stand-up comedy, MCing a parade, and getting rejected by a dating show. She also wrote a letter to Jason Sudeikis asking if he’d go bowling with her. Did he ever receive her request? Geth texts Jason to find out. She also opens up about getting divorced and how a year of rejection helped her deal with anxiety and depression.

Oct 04, 2022
Ranger Danger

Elephants are overrated. At least that's what this former zookeeper thinks. A park interpreter opens up to Geth about her experience working at the zoo including the struggle to earn a decent wage. She describes her love of working with hippos and the dangers of "scary smart monkeys." She discusses her frustration with people in her state being allowed to own exotic animals and her issues with "Tiger King." She also shares her thoughts about keeping animals in captivity and details about her current position helping people connect to nature.

Sep 27, 2022
Pole Dancing & A Talking Bird (Live from Portland)

A hairstylist from Canada explains how she went from powerlifting to pole dancing recreationally. She introduces the live audience in Portland to one of her three birds. Will he squawk his signature line, "did you poopie?" You'll have to wait and see! She also shares with Geth the story of being proposed to by her high school sweetheart in a hotel bathroom. Later on, they debate if she has a Canadian accent and discuss their scariest bird moments.

Sep 20, 2022
Pharmacy Technician to Welder

Getting arrested on New Year's Eve was a blessing in disguise. A woman describes how working as a pharmacy tech led to pill addiction. She opens up to Geth about starting detox in prison and healing her relationship with her son. She also shares what it's like welding "space crap" with lasers and what she's learned in recovery about empathy.

Sep 13, 2022
Wedding Season (Live from Michigan)

Everyone lied to her about what it’s like to plan a wedding. A bride-to-be opens up about stress, making tough decisions, and wedding crashers leading up to the big day. She and Geth bond over how great it feels not to invite someone you don’t actually like. Later on, Chris and the audience help write her vows and pick out a wedding song.

Sep 06, 2022
The Nerd That Becomes the Bully

He didn’t become the person he wanted, so he took it out on her. A young woman speaks with Geth about her abusive ex and the red flags she realized in retrospect. She opens up about how he used pity as a manipulation tactic, threatened "social blackmail," controlled how she dressed, and ended the relationship while they were tripping on acid. She also describes the eventual fallout between their mutual friends and how much better her life is now. 

Aug 30, 2022
Dodging Bombs & Tornados (Live from Boston)

A gum covered dog, a bomb threatened hospital, and a tornado warning. A woman describes the cartoonish obstacles she had to overcome to visit her ailing father. She opens up to Geth about navigating family drama and the weirdness of getting emails about Father’s Day. Later on, the audience welcomes her to the “dead dad club” with no shortage of dark jokes.

Aug 23, 2022
Big City To The Middle of Nowhere

The nature is good, but the isolation and no pizza delivery? Not so great. A lawyer speaks with Geth about transitioning from big city living to farm life. She opens up about her discomfort “presenting as wealthy,” growing up working class, and raising her kids not to be spoiled. Later on, she shares what happened when her baby needed brain surgery and her deep appreciation for Canada's healthcare system. 

Aug 16, 2022
Cocaine Lady Is Also a Scorpio (Live from Pittsburgh)

She got ghosted by a guy with a pet rabbit named Bun Bun, but not before he gave her covid. A painter explains to Geth why she moved into an RV with a crystal-selling-hippie and how she confronted him at his mom's house. She also discusses the time her dad talked her down during an acid trip, why she quit drugs during the pandemic, and how different her life is now.

Aug 09, 2022
Young Guy With A Positive Attitude

Wrist surgery turned into something more serious and his dog lost a leg to cancer, but that won’t keep this caller down. Geth speaks with a 25-year-old about how growing up without a ton of money and selling homemade yarn balls to pay for summer camp shaped his positive outlook on life. He shares stories about delivering Peloton bikes to billionaires, working in real estate, and growing up in a religious household. He also opens up about getting married young and proudly describes his wife as “badass” for becoming a commercial pilot.

Aug 02, 2022
Nothing But Threesomes (Live from Woodstock)

A 24-year-old woman keeps getting hit on by couples, but she's never had a threesome. Geth and a live audience help her decide if she should go on a throuple date for the free food. She also opens up about moving from a small island to NYC to escape the fighting between her mom and grandma. She wonders if her dysfunctional family is the reason she attracts engaged women, married men who claim to be in the secret service, and other "crazy people."

Jul 26, 2022
Quitting Journalism

A queer journalist opens up to Geth about the pressure to be active on social media and feeling traumatized covering the news. They discuss the complicated relationship between comedy and journalism and what happened when he got called out in someone's special. He also talks through his frustrations with clickbait headlines and famous comedians making jokes about trans people.

Jul 19, 2022
Solo Traveler (Live From Sirius XM)

Live from Sirius XM studios in New York, it's Beautiful/Anonymous!A 31-year-old single Californian shares the pros and cons of traveling around Europe alone. She speaks with Geth about how she kept the trip a secret from her job and the perks of crying with a mask on at Euro Disney. She also discusses feeling guilty as the daughter of Indian immigrants for wanting to renounce her U.S. Citizenship after the overturning of Roe v. Wade.

Jul 12, 2022
Heart Attack At 42

A woman describes the surprising events that led to her heart attack. She opens up to Geth about the fact that her brother died last year of a heart attack at 42 under completely different circumstances. She also shares the letter she wrote to her husband detailing her final wishes, including that he not sprinkle her ashes on their garden and grow "death tomatoes." Later on, she discusses planning a booze cruise funeral, the pros of not having kids, and feeling at peace with her life.

Jul 05, 2022
Foster Parents Who Love D&D (Live from Seattle)

A married couple who recently became foster parents talk about what motivated them to foster and how it’s dramatically changed their lives.

They open up about how everyday is "emotional limbo" because they don't know if the kids will return to their birth parents. They also share their love of D&D, revealing character names such as Trina Tinkleberry the gnome. 

Jun 28, 2022
Two Married People Have An Affair

Chris speaks with a man about having an affair with a married woman he met at work and the aftermath of his decision. He opens up about getting divorced and losing friends. He also shares how his bipolar disorder affected the marriage and the importance of focusing on his mental health now.

Jun 21, 2022
Big Time Goof (Live from Ann Arbor)

A self described “big time goof” with a laugh you won't forget opens up to Geth about his dreams of becoming a traveling musician. The former children's librarian discusses his favorite children's book "Everybody Poops" and explains why he calls himself "the king of cats." He also plays a song inspired by his life loosely titled “Narrow Urethra.” You can guess what that’s about. 

Jun 14, 2022
Queerness and Faith

In order to keep her faith, she had to accept who she really was. A woman speaks with Geth about going through a breakup and bringing her queerness and spirituality into alliance. She opens up about being part of a church that did more harm to her than good and finding a higher purpose. She also discusses moving back in with her parents post breakup and a potential autism diagnosis. 

Jun 07, 2022
Drug Money For Law School

A law student shares how he ended up paying for school selling weed on the dark web. He explains why he thinks college is a scam and how dealing drugs is a study in human behavior. He also confirms Geth's suspicions that law students like to party with a story about a mimosa brunch gone awry. 

May 31, 2022
Improvisational Jazz

A piano playing jazz musician improvises songs with Chris about his son's tummy troubles, art, and life. She also opens up about doing a stand-up set for her musical hero and experiencing harassment as a woman in the jazz world.

May 24, 2022
Raising a Son With Autism

A father in Portugal opens up to Geth about fatherhood and raising a child with Autism. He explains how his son’s diagnosis made him start to question if he too might be on the Autism spectrum. He also discusses where to vacation in his home country and some things you might not know about Portugal.

May 17, 2022
Mixed-Orientation Marriage

After 20 years together, her husband told her that he was attracted to men. Now they're in an open marriage and still best friends. A woman opens up to Geth about being honest with their kids, sex after menopause, and her husband’s Parkinson’s diagnosis.

May 10, 2022
The Land Of Smiles (Live from Denver)

A native Texan opens up to Geth about leaving everything behind after her mom’s death and moving to Thailand. She shares a crazy story about the time she got robbed then moved in with a Muay Thai fighter. She also talks about the complicated relationship she had with her mom including the fact that she slept with several of her friends. This episode includes a conversation about suicide, so please keep that in mind before you listen. If you or someone you know needs help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

May 03, 2022
Identical Twins

Geth speaks with charming, identical twin geniuses about “twin hopping,” fraternal twin frauds, and who would play them in a film. They get into twin shenanigans like convincing people that identical twins don't have belly buttons. Chris pitches ideas for a twin hosted podcast. They also discuss their jobs including working in national security and creating virtual reality textbook illustrations.

Apr 26, 2022
Attacked By Birds Listening to Beautiful/Anonymous (Live from Sacramento)

An ornithologist speaks with Geth about studying skuas and the time she almost punched a penguin. She opens up about how working in the field has affected her love life. She also describes the special bond that comes from living with a small group in a remote area and the joy of eating ice cream in Antarctica.  

Apr 19, 2022
Autopsy Technician

An autopsy technician explains the origins of his dark sense of humor and why he wants a career change. He also opens up to Geth about the importance of emotionally detaching during an autopsy, the hardest he’s laughed a work, and how playing guitar helps him unwind. This episode includes graphic talk about autopsy work and mentions of sexual assault. So please keep that in mind before you listen and if you find these topics distressing, you might want to join us next episode instead.

Apr 12, 2022
New Job, Dead Dad

A daughter opens up about losing her dad and going through a big career change at the same time. She shares the strange way she got her new job and how it felt to plan a funeral for someone she never really knew. 

Apr 05, 2022

A woman opens up about being a closeted bisexual during her marriage. She shares with Geth how infertility issues and getting divorced led to coming out as polyamorous. She also discusses having Polycystic Ovary Syndrome and what it’s like being in a throuple.

Mar 29, 2022
Clothing Optional Gay Resort (Live from San Francisco)

Where does one put their room key and vax card at a nude resort? Our caller reveals the answer to Geth live from San Francisco. He shares his theory on why older gay men are drawn to Palm Springs. Later on, he tells the bizarre story of temporarily losing his hearing and sense of balance. He also talks about losing his brother to addiction, making his friend go to rehab, and helps an audience member choose their next tattoo.

Mar 22, 2022
Hiked the Appalachian Trail

A man discusses the biggest challenges of hiking the trail and the scariest thing of all: Lyme disease. He describes legendary (and sometimes creepy) people known along the trail including the shirtless “hammer man” and the hospitality of “trail angels.” He also shares a story with Geth about a stranger’s kindness and how it gave him the strength to go on.

Mar 15, 2022
Divorced at 25

A young woman describes living life backwards after buying a home at 22 then moving in with roommates post-divorce with her baby. She also opens up to Geth about coming from a family of 8 and the fact that her son is only 1 year younger than her sister.

Mar 08, 2022
Warrior Shaman

Years of PTSD nearly destroyed this former Green Beret's life, until he found a new path. He speaks with Geth about the Ayahuasca retreat that changed everything and how he became a shaman. He also shares how he's been helping other veterans cope with trauma and why psychedelics should be more easily accessible. 

Mar 01, 2022
First Burp, First Kid (Live From Omaha)

Geth speaks with a new dad who recently got surgery to help him burp. Will the live crowd in Omaha get to hear the caller belch? Only time will tell. He and Chris also talk about favorite sodas, like/dislike of plant-based meat, and the sudden urge to protect your kid once they’re born.

Feb 22, 2022
Dating and Disabled

A woman with cerebral palsy and a dark sense of humor tells the story of how her fiancé proposed. She discusses dating as a disabled person, "chair chasers", and why laughing is so important. She also bonds with Geth over a shared dislike of  "Cotton Eyed Joe." Plus, more of Chris' favorite Valentine’s Day stories submitted by B/A listeners.

Feb 15, 2022
Engaged, But In Love With Someone Else

In honor of Valentine's Day, we're releasing some funny, heartwarming, heartbreaking episodes about dating and romance. Either she gets married in 3 weeks or disappoints 160 Greek people. A woman opens up about having feelings for someone else and the fact that she has a baby with her fiancé. Plus, check out some of Geth’s favorite Valentine’s Day stories submitted by B/A listeners.

Feb 08, 2022
I'm a Sugar Baby

A graduate student getting her PhD in engineering talks about joining a sugar baby website to help pay for school. She speaks with Geth about how some of her clients just want companionship and what it was like living in “The Villages” for 6 months during the pandemic with her grandparents.

Feb 01, 2022
Bonus: Dad On Pills

We're bringing you a special bonus release of Chris Gethard's new audiobook Dad On Pills! This book is about Geth's relationship with being a dad coupled with his relationship with being mentally ill, growing up in the '80s/'90s, and so much more. You can listen to it for free by signing up at

Jan 28, 2022
Traditional Mexican Parents

Turning 21, leaving home, and a terrible secret. A young woman opens up to Geth about her mother’s reaction to a traumatic event that caused a rift between them.

Jan 25, 2022
Bread-sexual (Live From Rochester)

Sex or a “wee piece of toast?” A Brit opens up to Geth about being less horny during the pandemic and more into hobbies. She shares her love of bread and somehow it gets sexual. They also find commonality between the Rochester garbage plate and an English Breakfast.

Jan 18, 2022
Met My Fiancé at Her Wedding

She went from notarizing her now fiancé’s divorce papers to falling in love. A woman shares with Geth the story of meeting her partner and getting past their 13 year age difference.

Jan 11, 2022
300 Episodes, 300 Minutes

On the 300th episode of Beautiful/Anonymous, Chris stays on the line for 5 hours. The only rule? The caller decides when it's time to hang up. Geth speaks with a Gen Z guy about his complicated love triangle and catches up with a woman he met in an AOL chat room 20 years ago.

Jan 04, 2022
2022 New Year's Resolutions

From having more sex to writing a musical to leaving an abusive marriage, this year’s callers have some big goals for 2022. Geth also talks with someone who really doesn’t like bananas and a woman calls in from her bubble bath.

Dec 28, 2021
Borderline Caricature of an Alaskan

Building an airstrip, fighting bears, and grieving in the wilderness of Alaska. A woman tells Geth about life in her home state and about hiking to the middle of nowhere in the freezing cold after her dad passed away.

Dec 21, 2021
Ex-Husband Was A Pastor

Pregnant at 16, a whirlwind marriage, and exorcisms. A woman describes the disturbing practices her ex performed to “fix” someone’s mental illness. She also opens up to Geth about what it was like getting divorced from a pastor.

Dec 14, 2021
Adopting as a Trans Person

A trans man opens up about having to use his dead name on legal documents and other complexities of adopting as a trans person. He also talks about his love of video games and what it's like being married to a Wiccan.

Dec 07, 2021
Sexual Dungeons and Dragons

Robots and superheroes and spanking, oh my!  A 'NiteFlirt' phone sex operator talks about her job and diverse group of clients. Later on, Geth gets a taste of her phone flirt style with a little role play.

Nov 30, 2021
Frog Bog and A Porn Closet

A former carny talks about the time she taught a former president how to play Frog Bog. She also shares other crazy job stories with Geth including working for a tech company that had a giant porn closet.

Nov 23, 2021
Mom Fell In Love With a Scam Artist

A daughter tells Geth the story of a scam artist who manipulated her mother. She gets into the details of how this young man took advantage of many other divorced women.

Nov 16, 2021
Crisis Hotline Worker

Chris speaks with a licensed therapist about what it’s like talking people through a crisis and how their jobs overlap. They also get into the strange joys of having kids and the weird things that they do learning boundaries.

Nov 09, 2021
Met My Husband on Tinder

A woman opens up about going from Tinder match to marriage. She and Geth also discuss body positivity and geek out over marching band.

Nov 02, 2021
Honor Among The Barbers Of Kansas (Live From Philly)

Live from Philly, it's Beautiful Anonymous! A barber and middle school football coach reveals the weirdest thing someone said to him in the chair. He also shares haircut horror stories and his admiration for Geth's wardrobe.

Oct 26, 2021
Got a Squatter

A young woman let someone stay at her place, and now he won’t leave. She opens up to Geth about her social anxiety and an affair with a married man.

Oct 19, 2021
Most Isolated City In The World

Sunshine, self-made billionaires, and almost no COVID-19 cases. A woman from Perth, Australia lists the many reasons Geth should come visit her hometown. She also tells the story of getting locked out of her house by toddlers.

Oct 12, 2021
Used To Be A Monk

A former monk now mailman talks about why he joined the monastery and why he left. He and Geth also discuss the complicated history of the Catholic Church and memorable moments during his time as a monk.

Oct 05, 2021
An Italian Living In The US

Self deprecation, immigration, and pizza. A woman from Italy talks to Geth about coming to America and NYC’s roots to pizza. She also explains why she thinks people in her country are more self deprecating than Americans.

Sep 28, 2021
Famous In Richmond

Stay in Richmond or move to New York? A guy working for his family's meat business contemplates whether he should move for law school. He also shares with Geth how he became friends with his childhood bully.

Sep 21, 2021
Selling Sex Toys in Vegas

Ben Wa Balls and steel dildos and butt stuff, oh my! Geth talks with a sex toy designer living in Vegas. They also discuss how one gets into designing and selling sex toys.

Sep 14, 2021
Psychiatric Nurse

A psychiatric nurse opens up to Geth about how the pandemic has affected people mentally and the uptick in patients she's seen. She also shares what she loves about her job despite the challenges.

Sep 07, 2021
The Funeral Industry vs. Disneyland

A former funeral director explains why she quit during the pandemic. She also talks to Geth about the surprising similarities between the funeral industry and her previous gig working at Disneyland.

Aug 31, 2021
A Real Life Rom-Com

She’s in Canada and he's in Australia. They haven't seen each other in months, but they're about to be married. A bride-to-be tells Geth how she found love in Tuscany.

Aug 24, 2021
Quit My Job, Now I Sell Crossbows

Years of sexism at her corporate job led this thirty-something woman to quit and become a Twitch streamer. She also started selling crossbows and finds it invigorating.

Aug 17, 2021
Porno Disco Parties

Oil wrestling with lube, drugs, and "porno disco" themed parties. A caller shares with Geth what it's been like living in a Victorian mansion with 13 people.

Aug 10, 2021
Losing DACA

A young woman opens up to Geth about losing her DACA status. She also shares what it's been like for her family and trying to stay under the radar.

Aug 03, 2021
Diagnosed with Parkinson's At 30

A woman with Parkinson's talks about how getting brain surgery changed her life. She also educates Geth on the definition of masking and how medical marijuana has helped her. We decided to make a special t-shirt in honor of today's caller. Go to to grab your new favorite shirt, available in blue or red. All proceeds will be donated to The Michael J. Fox Foundation.

Jul 27, 2021
Hippie Dippie Public Speaking Consultant

A former Peace Corps volunteer explains to Geth what being a public speaking coach for Reiki healers and dentists entails. She also opens up about the strange journey that led to her current role.

Jul 20, 2021
A Posh Liver Transplant

The 'Posh Perspective' caller updates Geth on a recent liver transplant. She talks about the difficulty of processing that someone had to die for her to survive. Her girlfriend also shares what the experience was like advocating for a loved one in the hospital.

Jul 13, 2021
Dating During COVID

What’s it like to fall in love during lockdown? A thirtysomething aspiring gardener shares the pros and cons of dating during the pandemic. He also opens up to Geth about his journey to body positivity as “the big guy.”

Jul 06, 2021
Odd Duck Trucker

The deregulation of the US trucking industry led to major changes including the decline of unions over the last few decades. A Minnesotan truck driver tells Geth about his experience, how immigrant truck drivers are being taken advantage of, and how he feels as a liberal "odd duck trucker.

Jun 29, 2021
It Happened For A Reason

A mom calls in from the hospital after her baby’s abdominal surgery. She opens up to Geth about the ups and downs of having 2 kids with the same genetic condition.

Jun 22, 2021
Marijuana Mansion

A stand up comedian reveals to Geth why her AA group calls her “the real Mrs. Maisel.” She also talks about her time in the “marijuanna mansion” and what it’s like hanging out with hard partying symphony musicians.

Jun 15, 2021
Love Addict

A woman opens up to Geth about being a love addict and why it's different from sex addiction. She also talks about her struggle with only being interested in unavailable men.

Jun 08, 2021
Mr. Postman

Geth finds out whether dogs actually dislike postal delivery workers from an actual mailman. The postman also opens up about his dreams of becoming a chef and the weirdness of having to deliver penis pumps.

Jun 01, 2021
Native American Biological Engineer

A young woman opens up to Geth about having imposter syndrome as one of the few WOC biological engineering students in her program. She also describes being rejected by NASA and her dream of growing plants in space.

May 25, 2021
Saved By The Meow

A man opens up to Geth about being abused by a family member. It's a difficult conversation, but his meowing cat has strangely good therapeutic timing. If you've been affected by sexual violence or abuse, please call the National Sexual Assault Hotline, operated by RAINN. Call 24/7: 800-656-HOPE

May 18, 2021
The Real Netherlands

A Dutch woman shares her feelings about being from a “progressive country” and her thoughts on the United States. She also opens up about the difficulty of losing her dad to an illness that spanned 12 years.

May 11, 2021
Apple Watch Saved My Life

A 52 year old woman explains how her Apple Watch alerted her to a serious health issue. She also opens up to Geth about how she became such a positive person despite a difficult childhood in Colombia.

May 04, 2021
Black Teacher In Minneapolis

A teacher from Minneapolis opens up about what life in his hometown has been like since the murder of George Floyd. He also shares with Geth what he thinks others can do to combat systemic racism.

Apr 27, 2021
27, Dating A 53 Year Old

A woman shares what it’s been like dating a man almost twice her age. She also talks about what led to her making it to a 30 under 30 list.

Apr 20, 2021
Introducing Real Good

Hello Beautiful/Anonymous fans! Enjoy this episode of a new show that focuses on systematic equality. This episode features an interview with the Director of the Black Mental Health Alliance

Apr 16, 2021
Moving To Another Country

A teacher talks to Geth about moving out of the country for a new position. She also shares what it was like getting married during lockdown and how spite can be motivating.

Apr 13, 2021
I'm A Surrogate: Part 2

A couple months after speaking with a surrogate, Geth follows up with her because she had some unfortunate news. They speak frankly about a difficult, taboo subject but express an enduring hopefulness for the future. Listen to part 1 here.

Apr 09, 2021
I'm A Surrogate

A surrogate explains why having a baby for someone else is so meaningful to her. She and Geth also get into the difficulty of infertility.

Apr 06, 2021
Chinese American Adoptee

A Chinese American woman shares her thoughts on the uptick in violence against Asians in the U.S. She also talks with Geth about what it’s like having white, adoptive parents, and the layer of complexity it adds to the topic of race. Check out our show and many hilarious other pods featured on Stitchers first ever Comedy week! In app or at

Mar 30, 2021
Beautiful Shorties: One Year Later

A 19 year old looks back at her progress on the one year anniversary of her suicide attempt. She also talks with Geth about how her viral TikTok video led to successfully selling her art online.

Mar 26, 2021
Analyze My Dreams

A woman who loves working at a psychiatric hospital shares her dream journal with Geth and he loosely analyzes them.

Mar 23, 2021
Let's Talk About Sex

A sex educator shares her research on sexless marriages and why scheduling sex is actually a good idea. She also tells Geth what got her love life going again after being married for 20 years.

Mar 16, 2021
Beautiful Shorties: 72 Year Old Life Review

From Woodstock to raising 3 kids as a single mom to switching careers, a retired woman in lockdown has got a lot of stories to tell and so much more life to live.

Mar 12, 2021
Hallucinating Gremlins

A former vet talks to Geth about channeling his experiences in the military into comedy. He also shares his thoughts on the rise of militias in the United States and why he hates knitting.

Mar 09, 2021
Choose Love Everyday

A young woman opens up to Geth about falling asleep while breastfeeding and losing her baby. She theorizes about how much her being black had to do with being charged with manslaughter after the tragic event.

Mar 02, 2021
Beautiful Shorties: Mental Health Researcher

A woman studying the effects of poverty on the mental health of low income mothers shares what she's learned. She also opens up to Geth about her struggles with depression and how Ketamine treatments changed her life.

Feb 26, 2021

A woman shares how she went from being unhoused to getting her own place. She also educates Geth on day to day life as an unhoused person and how it changed her political views.

Feb 23, 2021
Widower Remarried

A psychotherapist in Israel talks to Geth about losing his first wife and how it opened his heart for another love. He also discusses getting remarried, being an older parent, and using his life as a tool in therapy.

Feb 16, 2021
Beautiful Shorties: Trans Woman In The Bible Belt

A trans woman speaks with Geth about the secret joys of transitioning and what happened when she came out to her conservative, Southern Baptist family.

Feb 12, 2021
My Son Is Deaf

A mom opens up to Geth about her unique hearing condition and raising a deaf son. She also talks about his career as a professional gamer.

Feb 09, 2021
My Friend Took Their Own Life

A young woman opens up about her best friend's suicide and the emotional toll it's taken on her. If you're thinking about suicide, are worried about a loved one, or just need emotional support, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Feb 02, 2021
Bonus: New Jersey Is The World

We're bringing you a special bonus release of Chris Gethard's new podcast series New Jersey Is The World! Geth's new project is an umbrella of podcasts exploring, celebrating, and laughing at the culture of America's most ridiculous state. He's gathered a bunch of Jersey guys who grew up together so they can combine forces in their quest to break down all things Jersey. And it also invites you, the public at large, to get involved.

Jan 28, 2021
I'm Narcoleptic And Collapsed During Sex

A woman describes what it's like being narcoleptic with cataplexy. She shares her wildest episodes, including when she's collapsed mid sex and mid laugh.

Jan 26, 2021
Gay 1st Generation Chinese American Best Friend

A wildlife biologist has a message for closeted first generation Chinese American boys. He and Geth also chat about the gay volleyball scene, why bats are cool (should Geth get a bat box?!) and nerd out about comic books.

Jan 19, 2021
Beautiful Shorties: OnlyFans, Good Sex, & Grilled Cheese

A recently unemployed woman talks to Geth about why she started an OnlyFans account and her complicated relationship with an older man.

Jan 15, 2021
I Was In A Harem

Sex, chores, and pranks. A young woman talks to Geth about her experience dating and living with one guy at the same time as several other women.

Jan 12, 2021
Dad Died By Euthanasia

A daughter explains why she supported her father's decision to die by legalized euthanasia. She also opens up to Geth about finding her birth parents and her final wishes for when her time comes.

Jan 05, 2021
Beautiful Resolutions for 2021

1 minute, no names, no holds barred. Geth takes 1 minute New Year's resolutions for 2021. Starting a garden, coming out to the family, making the perfect pancake, and many more.

Dec 29, 2020
Mrs. Claus Uncensored

A real-life bride of Santa tells Geth all the nitty gritty details, both naughty and nice.

Dec 22, 2020
Chicano and Trans

A trans teen explores their Mexican roots, sharing what they've learned about Mexican folk healing. They also discuss coming out as trans to their parents and the healing power of Coca Cola.

Dec 15, 2020
Another 39 Year Old Grandma

A recently retired real estate agent chats with Geth about what it's been like teaching her grandson at home and taking care of her dying mother. She also opens up about being a former drug addict and her views on reincarnation.

Dec 08, 2020
My Friend Murdered Someone

A woman learns from local news reports that her friend recently murdered someone. She discusses her relationship with him leading up to the murder.

Dec 01, 2020
A Pirate's Life

Ahoy, matey! Geth talks to (and sings sea shanties with) a real life present day pirate.

Nov 24, 2020
Everyone Is A Survivor (Tanya from Motor City Mayhem)

Geth chats one on one with Tanya from Motor City Mayhem (episode 187) about the aftermath of the home invasion that left his father dead and brother unable to speak. They discuss coping with ongoing grief, with some laughs along the way.

Nov 17, 2020
Beautiful Follow-Ups: Goosey Bumpies (#187 Motor City Mayhem)

Geth catches up with the Motor City Mayhem guys and sees if they've calmed down. He chats with them all together and then one on one to see how they're individually doing. The results are surprisingly heartwarming. Find more Beautiful Follow-Ups plus all of the Beautiful Anonymous archives, completely ad-free, only on Stitcher Premium.

Nov 13, 2020
My Husband Cheated With My Best Friend

Religious cults, vehicular manslaughter, and an extra marital affair. This caller has a lot to get off her chest. She also opens up to Geth about the fact that both she and the woman who had an affair with her husband are bisexual.

Nov 10, 2020
Groundhog Day

Distract yourself from election forecasting with the original forecasters. A caller introduces Geth to the world of Groundhog Day predictors including Clucksatony Hen and Buck Eyed Chuck.

Nov 03, 2020
Campaign Staffer

This congressional campaign staffer is passionate about Democratic politics and trying to help elect Joe Biden. He talks with Geth about punks running for office and explains why every politician should take an improv class.

Oct 27, 2020
Get Out (Of The Closet)

A caller opens up to Chris about the struggle to get his black, religious family to accept his same sex, interracial relationship. He also discusses the similarities between ‘Get Out’ and his relationship with his partner’s family.

Oct 20, 2020
Ending A Parade of Tragedies

A parade of tragedies, including being sued by her drug addicted mom, defined this caller's early life. After ending codependencies and working to remove herself from chaos, good things started happening to this pregnant mother of twins.

Oct 13, 2020
315 Days Without Opiates

An opioid addict in recovery says the drug turned him into the greatest liar in the world. He talks about staying sober, and he and Geth joke about how Gollum from Lord Of The Rings is a metaphor for addiction.

Oct 06, 2020
Fell In Love With A Hobo

A young woman visiting her ex in Berlin opens up to Geth about her relationship with a train hopping hobo. She also reveals how a customer service job led to a surprising diagnosis.

Sep 29, 2020
The Orgy Dome

A Burning Man aficionado has a bone to pick with Geth about comments he made regarding the annual event. They get into what goes on at Burning Man and yes, "The Orgy Dome" is exactly what it sounds like.

Sep 22, 2020
My Parents Were Psychics

A spanko & emotional nudist tells Geth about being exorcised by her psychic parents and fleeing a commune after one of the members tried to murder her mother.

Sep 15, 2020
My Dead Ex Is My Sperm Donor

This caller and her girlfriend are trying to have a baby via IVF in a very unusual way. She tells Geth about the many outcomes that the process could bring, including a scenario where both she and her girlfriend get pregnant.

Sep 08, 2020
Syrian Refugee

Her childhood was lost to the brutal civil war in her home country. Now, recently graduated from high school, she tells Geth about fleeing to the United States and the many challenges she's overcome.

Sep 01, 2020
A Special Ed Teacher with Autism

A teacher opens up to Chris about how working with autistic children made her seek out her own diagnosis. She also dispels myths about the autism spectrum.

Aug 25, 2020
Rescue Mission To America

An Australian woman tells the story of rescuing her daughter from an abusive relationship in the U.S., the resulting legal fight, and ultimately needing to join witness protection.

Aug 18, 2020
Caught My Husband With A Sex Worker

A divorcée shares details from the ledger of the 35 men she's dated since her marriage ended and some of them are wild. From hitting on someone else during a date to commitment issues, welcome to the "The Gong Show" dating game.

Aug 11, 2020
Math Guy vs. Geth

A doctor of mathematics has a bone to pick with Chris about his dislike of the subject. They get into what schools could be doing differently to teach math and the surprising connections between their chosen fields.

Aug 04, 2020
Protesting Magician In Portland

A magician explains why she doesn’t like other magicians and describes what it’s been like attending protests in Portland. She and Chris also unpack her first crush as a kid: Encyclopedia Brown.

Jul 28, 2020
A Posh Perspective

A young British woman opens up her experiences with racism in England and provides her perspective on the legacy of colonialism. Also: saving Prince William's life, squirrel fights & the time her mom attacked her girlfriend with ice cream.

Jul 21, 2020
Asexual Ex-Conservative Lunchlady

A lunchlady and former conservative tells Geth about how having a miscarriage changed her political views and led to a deeper understanding of her sexuality. Also, is Friday still pizza day??

Jul 14, 2020
Introducing California Love

Hello Beautiful/Anonymous fans! Enjoy this episode of a new show from LAist studios, California Love. The show seeks to understand what it means to belong and not belong to the places we are from.

Jul 09, 2020
Stalked By My Ex

A former engineer opens up to Geth about being stalked by her ex-boyfriend and why she decided to become a teacher. She reveals the difficulties of navigating the legal system as a black woman and the struggle to get her ex rehabilitated.

Jul 07, 2020
Mexican American Iowan

A recent high school graduate grapples with her dream of becoming a journalist and taking care of her brothers. She and Geth also discuss growing up in Iowa and her experience being sued for calling out a white woman’s racism.

Jun 30, 2020
A Bar Star Comes Out, Again

Gay conversion therapy, a failed marriage and finally coming out. A caller tells Geth about his religious upbringing and finding happiness later in life.

Jun 23, 2020
Romantic Wrestler

An indie pro wrestler tells Geth about going through a break up during the COVID crisis, proving that guys in the ring need love too.

Jun 16, 2020
A Black Woman in America

A caller navigates life as a black woman in America during a historic week of BLM protests. She and Geth also talk about microaggressions, the problem with "all lives matter," and her mother’s death.

Jun 09, 2020
Touching Strangers Faces

Going back to work amidst the pandemic is stressful for this cat-owning cosmetologist. She tells Geth her strategies to manage anxiety and gives him some advice involving a hair piece.

May 26, 2020
Quitting Weed

An all-day-everyday weed smoker considers quitting due to health issues (involving *enormous burps*). She tells Geth what it’s been like starting a new relationship during quarantine.

May 19, 2020
Native Alaskan in Anchorage

A Native Alaskan talks about life after thyroid cancer and fills Geth in on the music scene in Alaska. You'll never guess what happened when Pitbull performed in Kodiak!

May 12, 2020
Quarantine Breakup

A trans man talks about what it's like living with his gf post breakup and still sleeping in the same bed. He and Geth discuss masculinity.

May 05, 2020
Parkour Yoda

Physically conquering mental limitations is the ethos of Parkour according to this young psychology student. What really *is* parkour? Don't trust the click baity facebook posts, trust this guy. He tells Geth how jumping on random stuff helps him clear his mind.

Apr 28, 2020
EMT In The Epicenter

The emergency calls are at an all time high but she says "the darkness makes the light seem brighter". Geth helps lighten the mood by talking about the haunted spots in her Long Island hometown and they bond over their shared psych med prescriptions.

Apr 21, 2020
My Partner is a Medical Mystery

A young woman describes working as a nanny during quarantine with a toddler while having a sick partner in need of a transplant. She also opens up about almost being kidnapped and what she's looking forward to once lockdown is over.

Apr 14, 2020
Don't Say The C Word

Geth did something a little different. 75 phones calls, 2.5 hours. No names. No mention of Coronavirus. Chris talks to new dads, a lady with a fish named Slim Shady, someone with extensive knowledge of Harry Truman, a woman with an affinity for abandoned shopping carts, and many more.

Apr 10, 2020
How To Date A Sketch Comedian

Stuck at home under lockdown with her parents, an art student calls in and talks to Gethard about how coronavirus has affected their lives so far. Geth gives advice on dating a sketch comedian and she opens up about her experience dating a former child actor.

Apr 07, 2020
Union Worker vs. Robot Dog Uprising

Fired from his union position, this guy turned to gig economy jobs in the midst of coronavirus. Things are serious right now, but Geth still gets a chance to find out if he ever steals a jalapeno popper and they muse about a future filled with robot dogs

Mar 31, 2020
London Is Savage (in Quarantine)

An Englishwoman is passing the time while self-isolating with a dry cough. She and Chris discuss Coronavirus in England and what it's like growing up with a bipolar mom. She also reveals her surprising connection to The Great British Bake Off.

Mar 24, 2020
Love In The Time Of Coronavirus

An American living in China describes what it was like living with his other half's entire family for 3 weeks during the Coronavirus. He also shares the surprisingly romantic story of meeting his wife.

Mar 17, 2020
My Girlfriend Cheated, I Got A Dog

An extremely optimistic guy calls in to talk about how he got over his cheating ex by getting a dog, living in a tiny house, hopping freight trains and more. Plus, Chris shares what he’s learned on the cusp of turning forty.

Mar 10, 2020
I'm The Best Lyft Driver

A former teen mom found happiness after a car wreck by becoming a Lyft driver. She also reveals a surprising connection to Chris.

Mar 03, 2020
Hit By A Truck

Getting hit by a semi truck at work was only the beginning of this guy’s problems. With his future in doubt, he decided to buy his very own 10 acres.

Feb 25, 2020
Phone Call Hole In One

Does having an identical twin make you more competitive? This young, female athlete tells Geth about focusing her competitive twin energy into golf, while opening up about dealing with anxiety, politics, her sexuality, and twin "switcharoo" high jinks.

Feb 18, 2020
An Octopus Living in Baltimore

A Baltimorean waxes nostalgic about his hometown and talks about his near fatal encounter with a freight elevator. Things take an interesting turn when the conversation turns to toxic masculinity.

Feb 11, 2020
Dry Eyes But 2020 Vision

A Gen Z-er (or zoomer!) unpacks the complexities of being mixed race, her mom's secret pill business, why bird spit is a delicacy, and what it's like growing up in the age of climate change.

This episode is brought to you by Truly Grass Fed (, Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Joybird (www.joybirdcom/beautiful25).

Feb 04, 2020
200.5 Bonus: Two Hundred Things I've Learned From Beautiful/Anonymous

In celebration of the 200th episode, Chris shares 200 lessons he’s learned from Beautiful/Anonymous, ranging from heartbreaking to hilarious.

Jan 31, 2020
Citizen Of The World

A guy from the Deep South tells Chris some wild travel stories, and about the time he got hit by a car inside of a Waffle House.

This episode is brought to you by Teladoc ( and Ritual (

Jan 28, 2020
Bigot Chicken

In the drive thru line to get some fast food chicken, this caller tells Geth about dealing with the aftermath of her husband’s psychotic break.

This episode is brought to you by Teladoc (

Jan 21, 2020
Punky Brewster Saves The World

A caller in London talks to Geth about British & European politics, noting that there might be a problem with political parties founded by comedians.

This episode is brought to you by You’re Not Listening, Brooklinen (, Bombas (, and Teladoc (

Jan 14, 2020
Kinda Famous Secret Half Brother

This caller found out later in life that her dad isn’t her biological father. The story involves Gethard in a way you would never expect.

This episode is brought to you by You’re Not Listening, Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Ritual (

Jan 07, 2020
Beautiful Resolutions for 2020

Listeners (including a surprising number of aspiring novelists) called in for a series of brief one minute calls to tell Geth their goals, hopes and plans for 2020.

This episode is brought to you by Joybird.

Dec 31, 2019
Dredging It Up Again

Years ago, this caller dropped their phone while on the line with Chris and the call was lost forever. They finally re-connect and discuss passing for cis, family, masculinity and the musical Hamilton.

This episode is brought to you by Aura Frames (

Dec 24, 2019
You Can Go Back To Your Seat Now, Thanks

“It takes a toll on you quickly.” On her 22nd birthday, a former model who became a flight attendant talks to Gethard about her old career (scouted at a Jonas Brothers concert) and her new career (don’t go barefoot into the airplane bathroom).

This episode is brought to you by Morgan & Morgan (, Aura Frames (, Joybird (, and Native deodorant ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Dec 17, 2019
Philosopher Chef

Cocaine in kitchens, the widespread impact of a South Park episode on Yelp and review culture. A chef brings Geth behind the scenes of restaurant kitchens and then gets deep and reflective.

This episode is brought to you by Bayer, Brooklinen ( code: STORIES), Morgan & Morgan (, and Bombas (

Dec 10, 2019
I Did Poopy & I Know Calculus

What’s it like to be a public school teacher today? Gethard finds out from a fellow New Jerseyite.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Natural Disasters (, and Third Love (

Dec 03, 2019
Foster To Adopt

A parent talks about her family’s journey with foster care, adoption & a really long walk in Spain.

This episode is brought to you by Aura Frames (, Native Deodorant ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Morgan & Morgan (

Nov 26, 2019
Chill (with Justifiable Rage)

In her work as a community organizer, this caller loves listening to other people’s stories and asking tough questions. She tells her story and it includes a lot of struggles particularly with her father and his alcoholism including things like a warrant for murder and being surveilled by the State Police.

This episode is brought to you by Morgan & Morgan (, Teladoc (, Joybird (, and Aura Frames (

Nov 19, 2019
Polyamorous Group Real Estate

A caller is trying to get a mortgage to buy a duplex with a big group of polyamorous friends and family in Southern Maine.

This episode is brought to you by Teladoc (, ZipRecruiter (, Bombas (

Nov 12, 2019
Aspiring Pro Wrestler

Geth loves pro wrestling. This caller does too, and so much that he’s trying to make it in that world.

This episode is brought to you by Brooklinen ( code: STORIES), Third Love (, and Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL)

Nov 05, 2019
Motor City Mayhem (Murdered Dads)

Strip clubs, pickles and dad’s getting murdered, that’s what these bros bond over. In one of the most chaotic episodes ever, two callers are on the phone thousands of miles away while their buddy joins Gethard on stage at Ant Hall in Detroit!

This episode is brought to you by Bayer, Candid Co ( code: STORIES), and Joybird ( code: BEAUTIFUL25).

Oct 29, 2019
I Love You, Dad

On the first anniversary of her dad passing away, this week’s caller spoke to Gethard about how cool her dad was and how her family grieved the loss. Meanwhile, she provides an explainer on British culture and accents that leads to Geth’s laughable take at cockney.

This episode is brought to you by Bombas (, Teladoc (, and Bayer.

Oct 15, 2019

Working at a residential program to help girls who have been trafficked or are at high risk, a caller tells Geth about how her job is the best thing that’s ever happened to her.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Third Love (, and ZipRecruiter (

Oct 08, 2019
Bad Luck Johnny

This guy has had some really bad luck lately but he’s handling it as best as he can. Plus: epic dad stories involving: the mafia, drug busts & kidnappings.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL) and Brooklinen ( code: STORIES).

Oct 01, 2019
The Raccoon Roommate

An illegal (rescued) pet raccoon who eats cap’n crunch out of a shoe, Al-Anon, society, sex, working through trauma.

This episode is brought to you by Joybird ( code: BEAUTIFUL25), Candid Co ( code: STORIES), and Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Sep 24, 2019
Piles of Walking Goop

This young Scottish caller has a checklist of things to discuss, including the question: Are Scottish people comfortable with depressing comedy because it rains a lot or are they just born a bit sad?

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Bombas (, Brooklinen ( code: STORIES), and ZipRecruiter (

Sep 17, 2019
Jammers vs. Blockers

Things just kinda suck at this point in life, but this caller found sanctuary in roller derby.

This episode is brought to you by Fruit of the Loom ( code: STORIES), Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Circle Home Plus ( code: beautiful), and White Castle (

Sep 10, 2019
The Size of a Cantaloupe

This caller gives listeners a PSA: go to the doctor! She's managed to maintain an inspiringly positive disposition even after what she thought was just bloating turned out to be something much more serious.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Fruit of the Loom ( code: STORIES), White Castle, Third Love (, and Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Sep 03, 2019
Partner In Prison

Some addictions don’t get discussed that often. A caller talks about sex and love addicts anonymous and discusses the need to save oneself before trying to save the world.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet Podcast, White Castle (, and Joybird ( code: BEAUTIFUL25).

Aug 27, 2019
A True (Modern) Love Story

Celebrating her first birthday with friends, family & her girlfriend after 3 years in a mental health treatment center, a caller talks to Geth about falling in love inside the facility.

This episode is brought to you by Untitled Dad Project Podcast, ZipRecruiter (, Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and White Castle (

Aug 20, 2019
The Choctaw & Irish Connection

Having lived all over the world, a member of the Choctaw Tribe talks to Geth about finding a sense of belonging when visiting home from abroad.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Circle ( code: beautiful), and Bombas (

Aug 13, 2019
Fighting Through Life

Finding empowerment over past trauma through martial arts. This caller is a true badass.

This episode is brought to you by Life is Good Ping Podcast, Third Love (, ZipRecruiter (, and Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Aug 06, 2019
The Squirrel and the Giraffe

Hearing other people talk about themselves makes this caller uncomfortable. "It makes me cringe," he says, "being on the show is a terrible idea." Will this be Chris' second-ever hang up, or will the caller stay on the line to reveal what about human interaction freaks him out.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Circle ( code: beautiful).

Jul 30, 2019
I Found Closure

A caller opens up about a stigmatized condition and tells Geth about finding closure to a chapter of her life after hearing an old friend on Beautiful Anonymous.

This episode is brought to you by Milkwaukee Tourism (, Joybird ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Hamama ( code: STORIES), and Brooklinen ( code: STORIES).

Jul 23, 2019
Babysitting (Drunk People)

A bartender tells wild stories (murder!), how to get free stuff (drinks and rides home). Also, the found family & new home she’s established with the regulars. Plus, Caleb Gethard makes his podcast debut.

This episode is brought to you by Sword of Trust (, Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Hamama ( code: STORIES), and Bombas (

Jul 16, 2019
I’ve Never Told Anyone

A college student home for the summer, sitting on a living room floor with dog on lap, talks to Geth about an eating disorder that started in high school.

This episode is brought to you by Life is Good Ping Podcast, ZipRecruiter (, Third Love (, and ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Jul 09, 2019
No Guide Book to Grief

Planning a posh goth Halloween wedding, taking care of a 3 legged cat and processing grief after the death of a family member who had been hiding big secrets, this British caller prompts Geth to try bring the words crikey & blimey across the pond.

Jul 02, 2019
The Raccoon Incident

An online slang dictionary editor and vicious rabid animal attack survivor who had too much cold brew and ritalin talks to Geth about dealing with ferocious and heinous things.

This episode is brought to you by Honey (

Jun 25, 2019
Clinical Psychologist

A psychologist talks about the emotional toll of tough conversations, selflessness vs. selfishness & Geth asks: have you ever had to step out mid session because you had to pee or poo?

This episode is brought to you by Milwaukee Tourism (, Life is Good Ping Podcast, Honey (, and Joybird (

Jun 18, 2019
Go With The Flow

Geth gets a peek into the chaotic life of a stay at home dad with 3 kids, a 4th on the way, and a daughter in the hospital.

This episode is brought to you by The Life is Good Ping Podcast, Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Third Love (

Jun 11, 2019
The Ultimate Bad Roommate Story

Recently declared PTSD free, a caller is interrupted by a cute little mouse while telling Geth about being emotionally and psychologically manipulated by someone very close to her.

This episode is brought to you by Family Ghosts Podcast, Bombas (, and ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Jun 04, 2019
Life Is Weird

A caller tells Geth what it’s like to be a young, single, punk rock mom.

This episode is brought to you by Airbnb Experiences (, The Skimm (, and ZipRecruiter (

May 28, 2019
The Cuckoo’s Nest

Suffering from a physical injury from working too much & too hard, this week’s caller takes a break from building sets to get Geth excited about theme restaurants (Mars 2112, Jekyll & Hyde...Medieval Times!).

This episode is brought to you by Oh My Gut (, The Skimm (, Aura Frames ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Joybird (

May 21, 2019
More Alike Than Different

You don’t want to mess with a punk rock mom! Geth talks to a proud mother about how lucky she is to have a very unique daughter.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Aura Frames ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Third Love (, The Skimm (, and Stop Doing That Shit.

May 14, 2019
The Adventures of Glandon Oakfoot

You don’t really know someone’s complex, warped brain until they’ve been your Dungeon Master. For this bonus episode, a caller with lots of D.M. experience guides Glandon Oakfoot, Jomar Salveston and Tyrone The Terrible on a vital quest.

May 10, 2019
A Hero's Journey

A screaming cat with a rubber band around it’s head, Dungeons & Dragons, and an emergency suicide intervention road trip. This caller hasn’t slept in days because she recently leapt in her car to go help someone she’d never even met in person.

This episode is brought to you by The Skimm (, ProFlowers ( code: STORIES), and Oh My Gut (

May 07, 2019
Sky Full of Ghosts

A past caller who’s made strides in living with grief, learning to tell her story and finding a path of acceptance catches up with Gethard in studio (no phones!). They ask: Are we living in a simulation? What’s dark matter? What type of scientist parties the hardest?

This episode is brought to yo by ProFlowers ( code: STORIES), Casper Mattresses (, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and ZipRecruiter (

Apr 30, 2019
Kaleidoscope of Danger

Calling from a country described as filled with cognitive dissonance and very passionate people, this caller provides Geth a powerful portrait of her country, talking about LGBTQ rights & the most dangerous karaoke song ever. Plus, a very important request for whenever you talk to someone at a call center.

This episode is brought to you by Vrbo, Aura Frames ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Third Love (

Apr 23, 2019
Called Once, Listened Never

A guy who has never even listened to this podcast talks to Gethard about a bunch of stuff for an hour.

This episode is brought to you by Vrbo, Joybird (, Aura Frames, Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Apr 16, 2019
Broke In The USA

Living in New Jersey and hating it, the gig economy and trying to get by being broke in the USA are on this caller’s mind.

This episode is brought to you by Vrbo and Bombas.

Apr 09, 2019
Porn, Drugs, Murder & Learning To Love

Kidnapping, murder, sex, cocaine, ketamine and porn. This caller’s family is at the center of a true crime story. She tells Geth about how she’s suffered on her journey to learn how to be loving.

This episode is brought to you by Vrbo app and Madison Reed ( code: PEOPLE).

Apr 02, 2019
Episode 1: Harry’s Aussie Best Friend

New host Harry Nelson takes his first of many successful calls. He gets a caller from Australia on the line and talks about America, but also the writing process, the history of First Nations’ people, and why he’s already a better host than Chris Gethard ever was.

Apr 01, 2019
Hold My Caipirinha

Gethard heard he has a cult following in Brazil, so this week the line was open to Brazilian numbers only. Immigration issues, education and social work are on the caller’s mind. She also opens up about sexual assault and abuse.

This episode is brought to yo by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), ZipRecruiter (, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Drop (

Mar 26, 2019

While smoking a bowl in his garage, a stay at home dad talks to Gethard about parenting. They share stories about protective dad instincts and recognizing mistakes.

This episode is brought to you by Neou Fitness ( code: STORIES), Third Love (, Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Joybird (

Mar 19, 2019
My Dad Owns A Strip Club

A few years ago, this caller took a job working at her dad’s strip club. There were duffel bags full of cash and other shady stuff. She thought showing tolerance for her father’s demons might help him understand her own, but things didn’t turn out as expected.

This episode is brought to you by Drop (

Mar 12, 2019
Car Crash

Years later, this caller still hears the sounds of the tragic car accident he survived. He tells Geth how he won’t let the trauma of the crash revive the anxiety he overcame in his younger days. They also talk about an internet dating experience that turned into something like a Black Mirror episode.

This episode is brought to you by OkCupid, eero ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Dexter Guff is Smarter Than You podcast.

Mar 05, 2019
Love At First [blank]

A blind caller tells Geth his touching internet-era love story & explains why he considers himself a visual learner.

This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (, Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Dexter Guff is Smarter Than You podcast.

Feb 26, 2019
The King of Silver Linings

A stress-free 34 year old who loves what he does for a living has to decide what to eat for lunch.

This episode is brought to you by ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Joybird (, and Third Love (

Feb 19, 2019
Meta Millennial

A social media manager slash graphic designer pitches her podcast & gives Gethard instagram advice.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon, Calm (, OkCupid, and Terrible, Thanks for Asking podcast.

Feb 12, 2019

Raised by liberals, after becoming a mom as a teenager, this caller’s politics shifted. Some would now call her a “Republican in name only” or a “compromising conservative,” but she disagrees. Her compelling life story is a jumping off point to search for a little common ground with Geth.

This episode is brought to you by OKCupid and ZipRecruiter (

Feb 05, 2019
In Loving Arms

This episode includes: a double-headed red dildo, binders full of sperm, epilepsy, addiction & rehab. But most importantly, it’s about an inspiring mom who’s been through a whole heck of a lot to support and protect her family.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( and eero ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Jan 29, 2019
Crying Into My Boba

Too many edibles. A missing sister. Paranoia. Depersonalization & derealization. This week’s caller had a tough 2018, but with therapy and treatment, she’s conquering one thing at a time.

This episode is brought to you by Joybird (, Third Love (, and Calm (

Jan 22, 2019
American Ex-Pat & Berlin Go-Between

A caller in Berlin connects Geth with someone in Finland who happens to be from Oklahoma. Should Geth move to Finland? An American ex-pat helps Geth decide.

This episode is brought to you by Brooklinen ( code: STORIES), Simple Contacts (, and ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Jan 15, 2019
My First Job Interview Ever

In 90 minutes, a graphic design student will have her first-ever job interview. Luckily, Gethard is on the phone to help her get calmed down and psyched up.

Jan 08, 2019
Beautiful Follow-Ups: Love Goes On (#69 - Love Is Everywhere)

In June 2017, a mother of 5 spent an hour talking to Chris while in a waiting room, about to hear life or death test results from her daughter’s oncologist. A year later, she tells Chris that all her daughter wants is for her and her family to keep living life, to know it’s okay to be happy and to fight to keep her message, Love Is Everywhere, alive. Find more Beautiful Follow-Ups plus all of the Beautiful Anonymous archives, completely ad-free, only on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Premium, go to and use promo code 'STORIES'.

Jan 03, 2019
144.5 Bonus: Beautiful Resolutions for 2019

It’s time for the annual Beautiful Anonymous New Year’s resolutions episode. Listeners (and a couple special guests) called in for a series of brief one minute calls to tell Geth their goals, hopes and plans for 2019.

Jan 01, 2019
Queer Feminist Pagan Yuletide

Coming out of the closet to her family was this caller’s New Year’s resolution for 2018. As the year comes to close, she tells Geth whether she achieved the goal. One thing she definitely accomplished: getting her Trump-supporting neighbor to help her hang a pride flag.

This episode is brought to you by Palm (, Sun Basket (, and Calm (

Dec 25, 2018
28-Year-Old College Student

A real-life Frank The Tank living with hard-partying 18-21 year old college kids is studying geosciences with the goal of one day improving global water supplies. He’s struggled with some mental health issues, which has helped him provide guidance to his younger peers but he’s also learned a lot from them. The phone signal is a little crunchy at times but the phone itself has an origin story that makes it all worth it.

This episode is brought to you by Welcome to Marwen, Palm (, Third Love (, Stitch Fix (, Kopari’s Coconut Deodorant (

Dec 18, 2018
A Bridge Between Humans

Raised in Japan, this week’s guest moved to Canada because of the freedom and culture of openness. Hardly able to speak the language, she now works a job where she literally helps people speak for themselves in difficult situations. Gethard met up with her and recorded this just outside of an acoustically perfect concert hall in a noisy Toronto park.

This episode is brought to you by Welcome to Marwen, Fruit of the Loom ( code: STORIES), Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL),, and Caffe Monster.

Dec 11, 2018
Gay Mormon

Imagine if your mom found out you were getting married because she saw your wedding on the TV news. He called in to point out an issue with episode 14 (that’s 127 episodes ago!) but also tells Geth about growing up Mormon and being a stepdad.

This episode is brought to you by One Drop ( code: STORIES), Betterhelp (, Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Sun Basket (, Caffe Monster, and Poshmark.

Dec 04, 2018
I Lost 150 Pounds

What is it like to transform from very large to marathon runner very quickly? A polite but engaged audience in Toronto helps Geth out with some questions, like how her experience feels in the context of the body positivity movement (and they tweet some insults aimed at Buffalo). Then the audience really gets excited when they discuss tandem nursing!

This episode is brought to you by Betterhelp (, Fruit of the Loom ( code: STORIES), Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Third Love (

Nov 27, 2018
Basement Infidelity

A cheating husband, drugs, stalkers, liars and flipping houses. This week’s caller is at a critical juncture in her life and is a little unclear on where the truth lies.

This episode is brought to you by This Is Love podcast, One Drop ( code: STORIES), Kopari (, Bombas ( code: STORIES), and Ulta Beauty (

Nov 20, 2018
House Burned Down

Her home is engulfed in flames. She brings the geckos, kittens & dogs to safety and checks on the donkeys, mules, chickens and horses to make sure they are safe as well. Three days later, lying under an electric blanket with her cat, this week’s caller tells Gethard and the live audience in Los Angeles how she can’t sit around and cry all day, so she laughs through it.

This episode is brought to you by ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Caffe Monster.

Nov 13, 2018
Color of Sunshine, Color of Moonlight

Days after the 2016 election, a mother of three was nervous about how the outcome of the election would impact her children and left an emotional voicemail for Beautiful Anonymous. Two years later, she talked to Geth about the challenges she and her kids face today and all the love and beauty that inspire them.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), One Drop ( code: STORIES), ZipRecruiter (, Kopari’s Coconut Deodorant (, and Caffe Monster.

Nov 06, 2018
Wilderness Rehabilitation

On an eight hour solo road trip, a wilderness therapy guide takes a break from dreaming of the woods and insects to chat with Gethard. He’s a wanderer, a man of nature and a modern day philosopher and Gethard gets him to unleash some wisdom gleaned from his experiences outdoors: “You squat over a hole in the ground and everything just slides out”

This episode is brought to you by Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Third Love (, Stitch Fix (, and Ulta Beauty (

Oct 30, 2018
Vanity & Sanity

What is beauty? Maybe the answer is unknowable. For this week’s caller, searching for the answer to that question has been the source of a lot of emotions: anger, depression, anxiety, jealousy and sometimes happiness.

This episode is brought to you by Ulta Beauty (

Oct 23, 2018
Upward Slide of Happiness

Sitting on a bench in a quintessentially British location, near Queen Mary’s Rose Garden in London, a young Brit opens up with Gethard in a way he never would with anyone in his normal life. From his parents divorce while living on a rural Scottish goat farm to a recent web design related break-up drama, it’s a very authentic conversation that might make you want to go exchange secrets with a stranger in a park for an hour.

This episode is brought to you by Stitch Fix (, Dream Corp LLC on Adult Swim, Bombas ( code: STORIES), Caffe Monster, and The Hilarious World of Depression podcast.

Oct 16, 2018
Nap Time

“Day care is wild though, let me tell ya!” It’s time to put down a bunch of one-year-olds for a nap and talk with Geth. Married young and facing a divorce in her 20s, this week's caller is ready to have some fun. Geth’s advice: She has plenty of time to make mistakes.

This episode is brought to you by Hilarious World of Depression, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), ZipRecruiter (, and Third Love (

Oct 09, 2018
I Survived A Mass Shooting

A mass shooting survivor talks to Gethard about the love, positivity and beauty she has experienced in the year since the real-life nightmare she lived through in Las Vegas.

This episode is brought to you by Merge Records ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Kopari (, and Caffe Monster.

Oct 01, 2018
What’s It Like To Be A Man Today?

A European nomad with 30% battery and a very full bladder is riding a ‘lift’ in the Parisian Metro as she chats with Geth (and a live audience in London). She’s curious: what’s it like to be a man in today’s changing society?

This episode is brought to you by A Million Little Things on ABC, Calm (, Caffe Monster, and Bombas (

Sep 25, 2018
My Year of Sexploration

Last time this caller got through she talked about being a marching band teacher. She got through again. This time she gets very detailed about a year of pushing and exploring boundaries.

This episode is brought to you by Sun Basket (, Amazon Prime Channels (, Third Love (, and Caffe Monster.

Sep 18, 2018
Not Afraid of Life

A hard-working mom balancing multiple jobs and school has an inspiring approach to life. Geth tries to find out what it’s like when her Cuban side comes out: when she gets mad, she transforms, like The Incredible Hulk, and her soft spoken demeanor gives way to loud and boisterous anger.

This episode is brought to you by Warby Parker (, Casper Mattresses (, and ZipRecruiter (

Sep 11, 2018
Nervous Interrupter (Let's All F***)

A merch guy tells Geth about sexual experimentation on the road and coming to terms with his desires.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Calm (

Sep 04, 2018
40 Lbs of Cat

Is Facebook evil? Can the internet become a more humane and civil place? Beautiful Anonymous’s first official cat lady has a suggestion: A Sorry Sally Detector for internet communication. This week’s caller has the inside tech scoop-- she worked at Facebook during the 2016 election and is currently at Google.

This episode is brought to you by Pact Apparel ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (, and Bombas (

Aug 28, 2018
A Saudi Student in Canada

A woman studying neurobiology in Toronto talks about her experience overcoming the cultural differences between Saudi Arabia, Canada & America. Get some veggie poutine, this call was recorded live at JFL Montreal.

This episode is brought to you by Sun Basket (, The Hilarious World of Depression Podcast, Talkspace (, Pact Apparel ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Third Love (

Aug 21, 2018
Major Postal Bitch

Drugs, rampages, the postal system. This call has it all. Buckle up and enjoy.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Pact ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Bombas (, and Caffe Monster.

Aug 14, 2018
Goose, Not Maverick

Herding fighter pilots like cats, taking “go pills” to stay focused for long flights, imposter syndrome, “don’t ask, don’t tell.” These are just some of the unique things this active-duty service member has experienced while serving her country and she tells Geth all about them.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), ZipRecruiter (, and Caffe Monster.

Aug 07, 2018
Hanukkah With Fidel

A Cuban refugee met up with Chris in a New York City park. The realities of Jewish life in Cuba, seeing snow for the first time, and falling in love are discussed as flying garbage and passing loud New Yorkers occasionally interrupt.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Halo Top (, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Third Love (, and Casper Mattresses ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Jul 31, 2018
Northern Ireland

Northern Ireland: come for the apple orchards and beautiful cathedrals, not the disaster tourism. Born to a Catholic mother and Protestant father, this week’s caller attended a segregated school where they had more bomb scare days than snow days. She and Geth play a game called “How long can a person from the island of Ireland tell a happy story before a sad detail comes up?”

This episode is brought to you by Halo Top (, Care/Of ( code: STORIES), Madison Reed ( code: PEOPLE), and Talkspace (

Jul 24, 2018
Prison Bound

In a few days, this caller will turn herself over to federal authorities and begin a multi-year prison sentence. She tells Geth about how she ended up with a federal indictment, getting sober and all the fast food she’ll be eating before turning herself in.

This episode is brought to you by Halo Top (, Talkspace (, and Madison Reed ( code: PEOPLE).

Jul 16, 2018
Out Of The Closet

A young man who has never told anyone about his sexuality finally does. He and Geth talk online relationships, coming out in conservative parts of the country, and being completely unimpressed by Mt. Rushmore.

This episode is brought to you by Halo Top (, ZipRecruiter (, Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Talkspace (

Jul 10, 2018
39-Year-Old Grandma

A young grandmother with a family tree that involves some unusually complicated math talks with Gethard about rolling with the punches and rising above the obstacles that life puts in her way.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Halo Top, and Talkspace (

Jul 02, 2018
I Cry On The Toilet

We live in a world that can be harsh, brutal and unfair. This week’s caller drives around and personally helps kids and parents in difficult situations. (Hint: The caller is not the one who cries on the toilet.)

This episode is brought to you by Hearts Beat Loud film, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (, and Casper Mattresses (

Jun 26, 2018
Smoking Weed in Christiania

Freetown Christiania is an area in Copenhagen where there are no laws and anarchy rules. This week’s caller is walking there to smoke weed with friends from all over Europe. She tells Gethard about life in Denmark in 2018 on the way.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (

Jun 19, 2018
She Killed My Father

Just ten years ago, transgender was a new word for many people, including this caller. When a close family member transitioned, it was a complex and emotional journey.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (

Jun 12, 2018
The Chillionaire

A goblin fiction ghost writer and artist at heart has an identity crisis after inheriting a million dollars from a distant uncle.

This episode is brought to you by Always Forever Maybe, Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Great Women of Business (

Jun 05, 2018
Charity Laundry

Raised in a troubled home, with parents who lived a transient lifestyle and a father who eventually ended up in prison, this week’s caller was able to rise above his circumstances and now works to give back to the community. Also, a casual debate ensues over the best NBA player of all time (Jordan vs. LeBron).

This episode is brought to you by Thomas’ English Muffins and Magoosh.

May 29, 2018
Irish Wake

This week’s caller tells Chris about the very close relationship she had with her recently passed grandmother. Gethard cheers her up with funny stories and by doing his best Freddie Mercury impression.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Thomas’ English Muffins, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and ZipRecruiter (

May 22, 2018
Quiet Rage

How do you become successful in comedy? How do you know when you’ve made it? In a return to form for Beautiful Anonymous, Gethard chats with an aspiring stand-up comedian about getting out of her own way and making art, even if that means embracing her creepy, pervy side.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL) and Thomas’ English Muffins.

May 15, 2018
Death Row Lawyer

Growing up in Northern England, this week’s caller became unlikely pen pals with a death row inmate in the American South. That experience, along with an unusual proximity to murder that she describes as a “family quirk”, inspired her career path.

This episode is brought to you by Brooklinen, Thomas’ English Muffins, and The Girl Who Smiled Beads.

May 08, 2018
Virtual Dominatrix

A political science student and self-described ‘Robin Hood of sugar babies’ talks with Geth about the significant emotional labor that goes into online sex work and the commensurate earnings. She also discusses her political aspirations, including her ideal running mate (hint: together they'll make money moves).

This episode is brought to you by 9 Days and 9 Nights, Thomas’ English Muffins, ZipRecruiter, and The Girl Who Smiled Beads.

May 01, 2018
If They Say No, They Mean No

A young man describes three difficult experiences of being sexually assaulted and overcoming drug addiction. It's a raw, honest conversation that is occasionally interrupted by Snapchat notifications and a barking puppy.

This episode is brought to you by Thomas’ English Muffins,, and The Girl Who Smiled Beads.

Apr 24, 2018
Road Dogs

Driving 10-12 hours a day buying and selling machinery can lead to challenges like finding a good gym and getting sufficient protein while avoiding fast food. Gethard has a fun chat with two dudes on a long road trip about making major life changes, maintaining positivity after losing loved ones, and creatine farts.

This episode is brought to you by ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Thomas’ English Muffins, and Your Mechanic (

Apr 17, 2018
It’s Quiet Time

A mother of two talks about her youthful past as a wandering actor and the choices she made to change her life. Geth asks a question in this call that leads to the ultimate “Sorry Sally” moment: How much do Playboy models get paid?

This episode is brought to you by Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Thomas’ English Muffins, and ZipRecruiter (

Apr 10, 2018
Tasmanian Sex Ed Circus Performer

An aerialist turned sex education teacher from Australia chats with Gethard about her life on the road, falling in love and the challenge of explaining consent to high school kids.

This episode is brought to you by Thomas’ English Muffins.

Apr 03, 2018
Honne and Tatemae

Stuck between two cultures, a punk rocker calls in from the other side of the world to chat about finding his identity, navigating his country’s social norms and tells a story about how hard it was to finish a huge American burrito.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( and (

Mar 27, 2018
The Whirlpool Galaxy

Coping with tremendous grief from a recent tragedy, an astrophysics researcher talks to Geth about black holes, extraterrestrial life and the fate of humanity.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Your Mechanic (, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Talkspace (

Mar 20, 2018
Brady Bunch Wedding / Ron Paul’s Baby Returns

A juicy family history, a fast approaching wedding and upcoming gallbladder surgery are on the caller’s mind this week and Gethard helps her work through it all. After the call, stay tuned for a 2-year anniversary check-in (and live audience sing-along!) with caller #1, Ron Paul’s Baby.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, ZipRecruiter (, and Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Mar 13, 2018
Dealer Turned Surgeon

How did this self-described East Coast dirtbag go from selling drugs out of his mom’s minivan to doing brain surgery? His answer: Donnie Darko. Gethard asks him some hard hitting questions like: What skills acquired in drug dealing are useful as a brain surgeon? Why did he go vegan? Can he control a monkey’s brain with a special USB stick?

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: STORIES), RXBAR ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (, and Care/Of ( code: STORIES).

Mar 06, 2018
English Idyll

Ever heard of "granary bread?" Yeah? Then you’re probably British, like this week’s caller. If not, then get out your malted barley and listen to Gethard celebrate cultural differences with a mother and social media expert from England’s rural south. Opening up about difficulties in her past, she says: “you know, it was 14 years ago, but it’s still one of those things, when I open my heart to a stranger on the phone, can still make me cry.”

This episode is brought to you by Casper Mattresses ( and Talkspace (

Feb 27, 2018
One Hundred Anonymous

With a combined 200 years of life lived, a retired dentist and an amateur artist chat with Gethard about staying creative as you get older, living a fulfilling life, regrets and the fear of death. One key lesson: travel if you can, but skip The Mona Lisa, it’s just not that interesting.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Your Mechanic (, and Adam and Eve ( code: STORIES).

Feb 20, 2018
Sober Mathematician

Longtime listeners know: math is Chris Gethard's nemesis. A real-life mathematician calls in and gives Gethard the most thrilling math quiz ever on a podcast. (We feel safe making that claim.) He also talks about his struggle with substances in college and getting sober. Geth also tells a never-before-heard story about an unusual religious ceremony in the rainforest, which involves hallucinogens and terrible diarrhea.

This episode is brought to you by ( code: STORIES), Talkspace (, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Feb 13, 2018
Chemo Chameleon

Headed to her first chemotherapy treatment after a recent cancer diagnosis, this young woman is naturally a little stressed and nervous. However, spirits are soon lifted in a call that includes stories of haunted apartments, puns and a doctor’s note to party.

This episode is brought to you by Merge Records ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (, Adam and Eve ( code: STORIES), and RXBAR ( code: STORIES).

Feb 06, 2018
In The Candy Aisle

A man narrates his stroll though a Wal-Mart. As he peruses the aisles, from guns to kitchen appliances, the discussion ranges from philosophical to farcical.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( and Zola (

Jan 30, 2018
Boy Crazy

She does improv, lives in New Jersey and considers herself a "niche person." Needless to say, this week’s caller bonds pretty easily with Gethard. She explains what it’s like to be on summer break from college and a little boy crazy.

This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (, Talkspace (, and ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Jan 23, 2018
Monogamous Animals

"If anybody has seen hell, it would be me.” What starts as an immigrant success story ends up weaving through prostitution, revenge, tragedy, sexuality, morality and religion. Note that this episode contains difficult topics including sexual violence.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and HBO’s Crashing.

Jan 16, 2018
The Puppet Master

An art school grad talks about his success working in an emerging technological art form. Then, out of nowhere, something happens in this call that changes everything about Gethard’s world.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Audible (, and HBO’s Crashing.

Jan 09, 2018
Bonus: Beautiful Resolutions

Beautiful Anonymous fans called in for a series of brief one minute calls to tell Chris their goals, hopes and plans for 2018.

Jan 02, 2018
Successful Stalker

Can stalking your crush lead to a successful long-term relationship? A young woman tells Gethard about her years-long pursuit.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses, Talkspace (, and Sonos (

Dec 26, 2017
Wisdom From The Bushman

Unsure of her future, a young German woman finds herself in Australia picking cherries with a group of ex-cons & social outcasts. She passes the phone to a fellow picker and mentor of sorts who opens up about finding solace in the wilderness. He shares some practical tips, like how to hunt and cook wild pig. Hint: Don't use a fishing spear.

This episode is brought to you by Sonos (, Squarespace ( code: CG), Talkspace ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Zelle (

Dec 19, 2017
Picture A Sunset

The unusual malady that afflicts this caller stirs up a philosophical discussion about how we, as humans, experience and remember our lives and craft our stories.

This episode is brought to you by Sock Club, Squarespace, Casper Mattresses, and Zelle.

Dec 12, 2017
Hipster Hospice Chaplain

Gethard has a surprisingly light-hearted chat about death with an expert in the field.

This episode is brought to you by Zelle, Talkspace, Hello Fresh, Sock Club, and Brooklinen.

Dec 05, 2017
Black Cloud of a Husband

A mother of four tells Gethard about going from med school to motherhood, and how she escaped a troubled marriage with a controlling, manipulative man.

Nov 28, 2017
Cadaver Epiphany

A first year medical student tells Gethard how dissecting dead bodies changed her feelings on death. She opens up about how her mother inspired her to study medicine and some of the worst smells she’s encountered, like when she had to dissect a human rectum. Recorded live in Gainesville, Florida.

This episode is brought to you by CanvasPop ( code: BA50), Sonos (, and Talkspace (

Nov 21, 2017
Head Injury

A guy got hit really hard in the head. He tells Gethard all about it.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Talkspace (, Casper Mattresses (, and Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Nov 14, 2017
Plant Splooge

A bonafide geologist tells Geth about fossilized dung fungi and the behind the scenes secrets of the Museum of Natural History. They also talk about how quickly the Earth is dying and weigh the likelihood of colonizing Mars.

This episode is brought to you by Sonos (, Hello Fresh ( code: STORIES30), Audible (

Nov 07, 2017
Moravian Trademonk

“You can’t give puppies cow vaccines.” That’s how this caller ends her hour with Gethard. The journey to that moment takes us through: Italian Madrigals, getting licked by a baby cow, going on a tour of a cranberry marsh, and a very personal story about the loss of a friend. All this while she's prepping to perform a show that starts right when the call ends.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Talkspace (, and Sonos (

Oct 31, 2017
A True Crime Investigator

Usually this caller is the one conducting the interview. He’s a police officer by trade, but he works a little differently than your average cop. He investigates major crimes including sex crimes, shootings, robberies and murders. He tells Geth about some major cases from his career as well as his opinion on the podcast Serial.

This episode is brought to you by Hello Fresh ( code: STORIES30), Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Sonos (

Oct 24, 2017
The Relaxed Satanist

Gethard has a meandering chit chat with a photographer and former photo developer who details the unusual things people put on film, like nazi motorcycle gang orgies and police crime scene photos. The caller opens up about his interest in the macabre and surprises Geth with his unusual tattoos.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Talkspace (, and ZIpRecruiter (

Oct 17, 2017
Sex Toys and Bourbon

A nice midwestern girl moved to LA. While fixing herself a drink, she tells Gethard tales of porn, vomit, hair extensions and an elopement.

This episode is brought to you by ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses (, and Sonos (

Oct 10, 2017
Rabbits and Catholics

Recently engaged to a deeply Catholic man, this week’s caller asks Gethard for some guidance. Also in this week’s call: weird stuff at cybernetic garage sales, near death experiences at jury duty, and an answer to the question: How do rabbits react to the sound of Gethard’s voice?

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (, and Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Oct 03, 2017
Hiding In A Storage Space

Today's caller is a dad with two sons who just dropped his 5 year old off for his first day of Kindergarten and he and his wife have their first couples therapy appointment that afternoon. The caller says that recent professional changes, growing confidence and a desire to get more out of life are driving him and wife apart but Gethard notices him expressing strong feelings toward a female coworker.

This episode is brought to you by Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Squarespace ( code: CG), ZipRecruiter (, and Hello Fresh ( code: STORIES30).

Sep 26, 2017
Civil War Survivor

Today’s caller was injured by grenade shrapnel as a young child and brought to the U.S. by her mother to receive medical treatment. She tells Chris about her family’s experience living through an extended civil war and building a life in the United States.

This episode is brought to you by Sonos (, Talkspace (, Casper Mattresses (, and Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL).

Sep 19, 2017
Bloomin' Love

Santería, possible mafia connections and digestive troubles are a part of this week’s caller’s complicated family history. Calling from a Dunkin’ Donuts bathroom, this rambunctious fun-loving bartender tells Chris hilarious, bizarre, and gross anecdotes about her family, drunken adventures, and her pro golfer BF.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and ZipRecruiter (

Sep 12, 2017
Coming Out with Katie Couric

Iconic journalist Katie Couric joins Gethard as guest co-host. They chat with a college student in an early stage of major life changes. The caller bravely opens up about some very personal and emotional stuff...and also talks about having a unique emotional connection to Gethard because she’s seen people eat burritos off of his belly.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, RXBAR ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Magoosh ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Sonos (

Sep 05, 2017
A Big Hole

Eight months pregnant and she loves messing with people, this week’s caller is celebrating her birthday on Beautiful Anonymous. She tells Gethard about some pregnancy-driven life hacks. Controversial birthing practices? They go there.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Squarespace ( code: CG), Blue Apron (, and Bound to Delight (

Aug 29, 2017

An African American military vet living in Charlottesville discusses the recent protests in his town. He tells Chris about confronting KKK rallies and how to deal with white supremacists. He’s also playing Mario Kart and really hates Peach.

This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (, Talkspace (, and Brooklinen (www.brooklinen code: BEAUTIFUL).

Aug 22, 2017
Holy Moly

Having dealt with mental health issues and an eating disorder this caller now helps others confront those problems. She tells Chris about the repercussions of coming out in a small town, and the two discuss their strategies for dealing with anxiety, including the best funny animal videos on YouTube.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Casper Mattresses (, ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Book of The Month: Bound to Delight (

Aug 15, 2017
Homeschooled Bigfoot Hunter

Sasquatch. Bigfoot. Skunk-Ape. Yeti. Whatever you want to call it, this week's caller is on the hunt. A homeschooled paranormal enthusiast, he tells Chris about some of the things he believes in.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, The Butterfly Effect with Jon Ronson (, Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Honest Tea (

Aug 08, 2017
Aussie Best Friend

An Aussie opens up about his family’s history which includes tales of drug dealing, substance abuse, mental illness, sex addiction and trying to find God in a hot yoga studio. Something really special clicks between Gethard and the caller, and not just because Americans love an Australian accent. Recorded in front of a live audience in Baltimore, Maryland on June 11, 2017.

This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter ( and Book of the Month: Bound to Delight (

Aug 01, 2017
American Studies

What college major could possibly involve writing an academic paper comparing the 1968 film “The Parent Trap” with the 1998 remake starring Lindsay Lohan? It could only be Gethard’s major, American Studies! This week’s caller chats about what it’s like to be an American Studies major during the Trump era and Chris shows off his talent for generating a good thesis.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Redbox ( code: STORIES5), Brooklinen ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Blue Apron (, and Bound to Delight (

Jul 25, 2017
Tattoo Parlor

Calling in from a tattoo parlor, this week’s caller is getting inked up to commemorate a grim experience. Some wild tattoo stories are told as the phone gets passed around. Secret family drama gets dissected: an estranged brother, internet stalking, rumors of the mafia.

This episode is brought to you by Redbox ( code: STORIES4), Squarespace ( code: CG), ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and HBO’s Insecure.

Jul 18, 2017
Love Is Everywhere

A mother calls in from a children’s hospital while waiting for her daughter's test results. Gethard & the caller shed some tears while discussing tragedy, sickness, pain and suffering. But it’s not all sad. Birthday parties, gelato, Disney World and other awesome things come up.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Redbox ( code: STORIES3), Casper Mattresses ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Book of the Month: Bound to Delight (, and ZipRecruiter (

Jul 11, 2017
Married The Day We Met

Gethard chats with a Soprano. As in the highest of the four singing voices in Opera, not a character from a popular HBO show. The caller speaks about troubled relationships from her past and, even more troubling, a serious childhood trauma. (Trigger warning: discussion related to childhood sexual abuse.)

This episode is brought to you by Redbox (, Honest Tea (, Away (, Thumbtack (

Jul 04, 2017
Country AF

On her lunch break, today’s caller engages in some light hearted chit chat about office gossip and her (sometimes frustrating) side gig as a wedding photographer. But then, when a hot button political issue comes up, things start to get heated.

This episode is brought to you by Redbox ( code: STORIES), Subaru (, Talkspace (, and Hulu Plus (

Jun 27, 2017
Sex Drugs and Retail

Ever wonder what it's like to be paid to secretly watch shoppers on camera? This week's caller works in the retail field of "loss prevention." He tells Gethard about the time he confronted a shoplifter and got punched in the face, and discusses how the American heroin epidemic is directly correlated with retail theft. Plus, Gethard hears a little bit about the caller's unorthodox personal life.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Hulu Plus, Blue Apron (, Squarespace ( code: CG).

Jun 20, 2017

This week's caller is a somewhat unconventional podcast fan. He loves Beautiful/Anonymous even though he's never technically heard an episode. Hmmm. Mysterious. He shares his unique experience with the medium, his outlook on life, and his best party tricks.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Hulu Plus, ZipRecruiter (, Casper Mattresses (, Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel (, and Detour (

Jun 13, 2017
Mother Moon (Live in Portland, Oregon)

A poet-to-be calls in to the Beautiful Anonymous live tour. She and Gethard get off to a slow start. That might work in the studio, but the live audience gets a little restless! So the caller turns to the people closest to her to help ramp up the excitement.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Detour ( and Talkspace (

Jun 06, 2017
Singer Who Won't Sing

Struggling to realize her creative ambitions in early adulthood, this week’s caller confronted body image issues when younger. Gethard gives her a pep talk and discusses the challenge of being creative while dealing with other people's judgement.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel from Audible (, and Detour (

May 30, 2017
Just Like A Johnny Cash Song

Raised in a tumultuous household and married at eighteen to the pastor’s son, today’s caller was divorced before she turned twenty. Betrayal, love triangles and shotgun deaths are all a part of the wild ride that she’s lived in her twenty-six years.

This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Squarespace ( code: CG), Detour (, and Talkspace (

May 23, 2017
Rekindling An Old Friendship

Against the odds, a caller from one of the earliest, most listened-to calls manages to get through for a second time. Unprecedented! The caller gives Gethard an update on what's happened in his life since his first call over a year ago. They chat about dealing with internet commenters (which might instigate some more internet comments).

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (, Blue Apron (, Casper Mattresses (, and ZipRecruiter (

May 16, 2017
Public Defender

Big parties with lawyers gathered around piles of cocaine. Inequality in the criminal justice system. Huge corporations ripping off the families of jailed inmates. Gethard talks to a public defender about these topics, and discovers her favorite word: alleged.

This episode is brought to you by Talkspace ( and Adam and Eve ( code: STORIES).

May 09, 2017
First Kiss

One hour ago, in the rain, this week’s caller experienced her first kiss. She tells Gethard about the high school experience in 2017 covering the new (Snapchat, group texting, nerd culture being cool) and the established (SATs, teen pregnancy, crushes). She also explains how writing Harry Potter fan fiction in the 6th grade led to her current hobby, writing romance novels.

This episode is brought to you by Subaru (, Talkspace (, and Adam and Eve ( code: STORIES).

May 02, 2017
Vinyl Market Researcher

Should this week's caller quit his lucrative corporate job to pursue his passion? His dream is to purchase a small business but he's nervous that he'll lose his financial stability. Chris chats with him about the plusses and minuses at play in this big life decision. 

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Subaru (, ZipRecruiter (, and Uber (

Apr 25, 2017

Gethard has a threesome! Okay,'s just a three-way phone call, but this week's callers are a married couple who talk to Chris about their swinging lifestyle. Find out how they meet other swinger couples, what the proper etiquette is in an 8-person orgy, and how they make sure their babysitter doesn’t find out.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Subaru (, Blue Apron (, Uber (

Apr 17, 2017
A Midwife Discusses Birth Schmutz

Chris asks a midwife some real questions: has she ever seen someone in labor punch someone else? And, what happens to the schmutz left behind after a birth? Politically divisive topics are covered and important lessons are learned (like, never tell a family that the baby looks just like the dad).

This episode is brought to you by Subaru (, Mailchimp (, Warby Parker (, Casper Mattresses (, and Bombas (

Apr 10, 2017
Trail Blazer

It's a story like something out of a surreal American novel, with wealth and poverty intertwined. On the phone while hiking a mountain, this week’s caller tells Chris about his youth, spent experimenting with every drug known to man. Chris was reminded of the famous quote from professional wrestler Dusty Rhodes: “I have wined and dined with kings and queens and I’ve slept in alleys and dined on pork and beans.”This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Subaru (, ZipRecruiter (, Bombas (, Uber (

Apr 04, 2017
What Not To Ask A Trans Person

Assigned as a female at birth, this week's caller has been socially and medically transitioning for close to four years. He answers some of the most common questions cis people have for trans people. He also tells Gethard what questions you probably should not ask a trans person. And somehow, this involves the Italian ham known on The Sopranos as "gabagool."This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Mailchimp (, Talkspace (, and Bombas (

Mar 27, 2017
Cruise Ship Mafia

After graduating from the actual (pre-Jack Black) School of Rock, playing with the likes of Peter Frampton, this week’s caller found himself traveling the world as a cruise ship musician. Get the behind-the-scenes details on life at sea and its secret black market economy, plus hear a very special Springsteen sing-a-long between two Jerseyites. This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Seeso (, Casper Mattresses (, and Talkspace (

Mar 21, 2017
Ron Paul's Baby Part 2

For the one-year anniversary episode, Chris reunites with the very first Beautiful Anonymous caller: Ron Paul’s Baby. Find out if having his story told to millions of people has changed him for better or worse. Did the spotlight destroy him or save him? Most importantly - has it gotten him some dates?This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Seeso (, ZipRecruiter (, and Blue Apron (

Mar 14, 2017
Made Out With My Teacher

A chance encounter at a coffee shop unearthed difficult experiences from this caller’s high school years. The troublesome nature of the call brings out Chris’s anger and rarely-seen “North-Jersey-guy-ready-to-break-bones” side.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Squarespace ( code: CG), Seeso ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Talkspace (

Mar 07, 2017
Fugitive Father

Having a reformed criminal kingpin for a dad has made it difficult for this week’s caller to find his path in life. At his father’s urging, he studied water systems engineering, which means he can answer a serious question that’s been on Geth’s mind: Why does the tap water smell so weird in Florida? The answer to that question may be a bit hard to grasp, but understanding will be found in the idea that a good father will respect his child’s hard work and dedication.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Squarespace ( code: CG), Talkspace (, and Warby Parker (

Feb 28, 2017
Bisexual Brahmin

The caste system, religion, arranged marriages and bisexuality are on the mind of this caffeinated caller. Raised in Kenya and India, educated in California and currently living on the East Coast, he opens up about dealing with his conservative religious family. The conversation spans from breaking down western stereotypes about Indian culture, to the amazing dosa place that Gethard goes to in Queens. This episode is brought to you by Seeso ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Mailchimp (, Talkspace (, and ZipRecruiter (

Feb 21, 2017
Power Grid of Love

Interested in the intricacies of how the US electrical grid functions? No? Well, you will be interested in hearing about how the caller wants to “disconnect from her ex-boyfriend’s power grid”. Love, in the language of electricity. Sit back and soak up the metaphors. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace ( code: CG), Mailchimp (, Blue Apron (, and Casper Mattresses (

Feb 14, 2017
Illness, Love & Dogs

Today's caller is recovering from a serious illness acquired while working on peace building in East Africa. He likes to give Chris a hard time but also talks about some deep stuff, like contemplating how to maintain one's idealism and passion when suffering from chronic illness. Also, he hopes the Beautiful Anonymous community can help him find a permanent home for a dog he's currently fostering.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Talkspace (, and (

Feb 07, 2017
4 Kids 0 Spaghetti

At a young age, he found himself a divorced father of four. Battling depression, all he wanted was to find a nice girl to take on a date for some spaghetti and meatballs. Recovering from the low point in his life, and from career stagnation, this college dropout wants to finish his degree and become a teacher. This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Talkspace (, Warby Parker (, and ZipRecruiter (

Jan 31, 2017
Inside The Heroin Epidemic

Addicted to heroin for ten years, this week’s caller got clean because she wanted to be a good mother to her new son. She tells Chris about how she started using when a high school boyfriend introduced her to pills. Eventually she was living in her car and spending time in jail, where she networked with other addicts and dealers. She hopes that by speaking with Chris she can help those who may be dealing with addiction themselves or have friends or family who need help by making clear that they are not alone. If you're looking for a place to get help, some have found and to be helpful.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Squarespace ( code: CG), and Talkspace (

Jan 24, 2017
American Daughter

Raised by parents who moved from Vietnam to the United States in search of a better life, this week’s caller is her family’s first American-born child. She talks about defying stereotypes and asserting her independence by dying her hair. Find out how her “Tiger parents” reacted when she embraced a goth punk identity in middle school and later when she went to work for a non-profit.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp (, Talkspace (, Secrets, Crimes and Audiotape podcast from Wondery, and Blue Apron (

Jan 17, 2017
Marching Band Teacher

How horny are high school marching band kids? Is it appropriate for a boy to dye his hair in the girls bathroom? This week’s caller drank a sh**-ton (sorry Sally) of coffee and raises these very important questions. She also uses her practiced ‘compassionate teacher’ voice on Chris, and gets him to open up about his feelings on creativity, fame and success.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp ( ), Squarespace ( code: CG), Blue Apron ( ), and Casper Mattresses ( ).

Jan 10, 2017
Queer Black Punk in Appalachia

Growing up as a black woman in rural Appalachia wasn't easy. She was different, and she was bullied. But punk rock saved her, and helped her form her own identity. Chris interrupts her Snapchatting at the start of the call, which leads to a discussion about their experiences with social media around the election.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp ( ), Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Adam and Eve ( code: STORIES), and Texture.

Dec 20, 2016
Escape From A Cult

Brainwashed into a religious cult. Our caller escaped 10 years ago, but she's only now starting to process the trauma: from sexual manipulation and poison, to hallucinations and "mind melding". Chris talks about therapy (and discovers a mutual love for go kart rides). This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Mailchimp ( ), HUAWEI ( ), ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and Texture ( ).

Dec 13, 2016
Single Mom Cancer Survivor

Today's caller discusses beating cancer and raising her son as a single mom. Through all of her struggles, big and small, she’s stayed relentlessly positive. Let’s just hope she doesn’t get fired for talking to Chris for an hour while at work!This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon ( code: BEAUTIFUL), Mailchimp ( ), Harry’s ( code: BEAUTIFUL), and (code: BEAUTIFUL).

Dec 06, 2016
A Sister Scorned

A "dolphin" personality type. Betrayal. Anger. Lunch at a buddhist temple. This week's caller has it all.This episode is brought to you by AMEX, Mailchimp,, Harry’s, and Talkspace.

Nov 29, 2016
Fail Army Cop

A small town police officer chats with Chris about the current state of policing in the United States. They try their best to reconcile a divisive issue that incites a lot of passion on all sides. And this is all going on while our caller is on his couch watching Fail Army videos on YouTube.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp, AMEX, HUAWEI, Casper Mattresses, and Joyable.

Nov 22, 2016
5% Romantic Interest

Hannibal Buress joins Chris on a call with a college freshman who is a lover of comedy struggling to find romance in his life. Should our caller ditch school and try his hand at comedy? Why were Chris and Hannibal crying last night? Is it normal to be aroused by stealing? These questions and many more will be answered.This episode is sponsored by Mack Weldon, Mailchimp, Totes,, and Talkspace.

Nov 15, 2016
Cuddly Pudge

Adopting a child from a foreign country takes a lot of time, patience, and passion. This week’s caller has all of these things. He also has the hope that his son-to-be will have the opportunity to experience virtual reality toilets.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp, Mack Weldon,, Talkspace, and Grommet.

Nov 08, 2016
Shakespeare On Molly

Burner, fire-performer-hoola-hooper-grinder-girl, and maybe, a modern-day Shakespeare (on molly) are a few labels we could ascribe to this week's caller. She's been through a lot, including the very shocking breakup of her up-and-coming band. Oh, and on a lighter note: heard of shirt-cocking? Guys, just don't do it.This episode is brought to you by AMEX, Mailchimp,, Casper Mattresses, and Joyable.

Nov 01, 2016
A Spooky Episode

Just in time for Halloween, Chris and this spirited artist trade spooky stories...until they are rudely interrupted by the ghost of an angry biker. But the corporeal beings prevail, if only for the caller to give Chris his least favorite nickname ever: Chris Giraffe-Herd.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp, Talkspace, and Totes.

Oct 25, 2016

Did someone say "brain orgasms??" Today's caller did! She gives Geth a lesson in how to whisper in just the right way to make Beaut/Anon listeners' brains tingle & feel the stress melt away. ASMR me ASAP!This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp, Grommet, Psychic Source, and

Oct 18, 2016
All About Cash

Dear Tom Waits, We look forward to hearing the song you write about this week's caller: falling in love with a stripper, skipping town in a blizzard, a christmas dinner in the demimonde of Boca Raton.This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp, Mack Weldon, Psychic Source,, and Joyable.

Oct 11, 2016
10,000 Pounds

London Calling! (or somewhere in England) Our caller works in the film industry, and in general she's a pretty happy person...except when her phone is being monitored by Jar Jar Binks, or when 10,000 pounds disappear. (That's GBP, y'all!)This episode is brought to you by Mailchimp,, Grommet, and Insecure on HBO.

Oct 04, 2016
Shopping at the Face Depot