Growth Over Easy: Relationship Skills for Long-Term Love
By Lilly Rachels
Listen to a podcast, please open Podcast Republic app. Available on Google Play Store and Apple App Store.
Image by Lilly Rachels
Category: Relationships
Open in Apple Podcasts
Open RSS feed
Open Website
Rate for this podcast
Subscribers: 1
Reviews: 0
Episodes: 199
Description
Growth Over Easy is a podcast about long-term love: what's really happening underneath the fights, the distance and the resentment, and how couples find their way back to each other.
I'm Lilly Rachels, a writer who podcasts and works privately with couples. I trained as a therapist (MSW) and in Relational Life Therapy, and I co-founded Relational Somatics. I always tell couples there are three sides to every story: yours, mine, and what actually happened. This show is about that third side.
Short solo episodes on conflict, repair, resentment, intimacy, and the patterns that keep two people stuck. Practical, honest, and human.
Read the weekly essays at Three Sides: growthovereasy.com
www.growthovereasy.com
www.growthovereasy.com
| Episode | Date |
|---|---|
|
Can Resentment Actually Go Away? 3 Questions to Ask First - #191
|
Oct 08, 2026 |
|
Walking on Eggshells? You Might Be the One Putting Them Down - #190
|
Oct 01, 2026 |
|
Relationship advice from my bfs mom
|
Aug 14, 2026 |
|
The Labels That Let You Off the Hook - #189
|
Aug 11, 2026 |
|
Stop Speaking Your Truth. Start Being Honest. - #188
|
Jun 16, 2026 |
|
The Time Machine: Why Every Fight Ends Up About the Past - #187
|
Jun 09, 2026 |
|
The Performance: Why Being the Easy One Starves Your Relationship - #186
|
Jun 02, 2026 |
|
The Scorecard: Why Keeping Score Quietly Kills Connection - #185
|
May 26, 2026 |
|
The Takeover: Why You Get Louder When You Need to Be Heard - #184
|
May 19, 2026 |
|
The Shutdown: Why You Go Blank in the Middle of a Fight - #183
|
May 12, 2026 |
|
Are You Picking It Up, or Making It Up? - #182
|
Apr 28, 2026 |
|
Say the Real Thing, Not the Right Thing - #181
|
Apr 21, 2026 |
|
If Your Partner Is Always the Problem, Nothing Can Change - #180
|
Apr 14, 2026 |
|
What ChatGPT Would Do as a Human for a Day - #179
|
Apr 07, 2026 |
|
What Happened, Happened: How to Stop Replaying the Past - #178
|
Mar 31, 2026 |
|
You're Not Fighting Your Partner. You're Fighting Your Image of Them. - #177
|
Mar 24, 2026 |
|
Why Everything in Your Relationship Feels So Urgent - #176
|
Mar 17, 2026 |
|
Stop Asking What to Do. Ask What You Want. - #175
|
Mar 10, 2026 |
|
Where It Hurts Isn't Where It Started - #174
|
Mar 03, 2026 |
|
"It's Just Feedback": Why Your Partner Hears Criticism - #173
|
Feb 17, 2026 |
|
You've Gotten Used to Being on Edge. Your Body Hasn't. - #172
|
Feb 10, 2026 |
|
Why High-Performing Men Snap at Home - #171
|
Feb 03, 2026 |
|
How Fear of Rejection Makes You Push Love Away - #170
|
Jan 27, 2026 |
|
Why You Can't Relax at Home, Even When Nothing's Wrong - #169
|
Jan 20, 2026 |
|
Why You Explode Over Small Things - #168
|
Jan 13, 2026 |
|
What's In and What's Out for Relationships in 2026 - #167
|
Jan 06, 2026 |
|
Withdrawal: Why Walking Away Slowly Kills Your Relationship - #166
|
Dec 30, 2025 |
|
Retaliation: Why "You Hurt Me, So I'll Hurt You" Never Works - #165
|
Dec 23, 2025 |
|
Unbridled Self-Expression: Why Saying Everything Isn't Honesty - #164
|
Dec 16, 2025 |
|
Controlling Your Partner: Why No One Likes Being Managed - #163
|
Dec 09, 2025 |
|
Fighting to Be Right: Win the Argument, Lose the Relationship - #162
|
Dec 02, 2025 |
|
Why Your Apologies Aren't Working - #161
|
Nov 25, 2025 |
|
The Fight Isn't About What You Think It's About - #160
|
Nov 18, 2025 |
|
Doing Everything Right and Still Feeling Disconnected - #159
|
Nov 11, 2025 |
|
Not Caring vs. Being Unattached: Why Acting Cold Backfires - #158
|
Nov 04, 2025 |
|
The Three Silent Killers of Communication - #157
|
Oct 28, 2025 |
|
The Relational Blueprint Method: How I Help Couples Start Fresh - #156
|
Oct 21, 2025 |
|
Married at 23 Without the Skills: Why I Do This Work - #155
|
Oct 21, 2025 |
|
New Name, Same Mission: Why the Show Changed - #154
|
Oct 21, 2025 |
|
Why You're Playing Two Different Games in Your Relationship - #153
|
Aug 11, 2025 |
|
Why "Not Caring If You're Cheated On" Isn't Strength - #152
|
Jul 21, 2025 |
|
Why We Shut Down in Love - #151
|
Jul 15, 2025 |
|
Stuck Waiting for an Apology? Try Emotional Courage - #150
|
Jun 29, 2025 |
|
Crying in the Mountains and Remembering What Matters - #149
|
Jun 22, 2025 |
|
Boundaries, People-Pleasing, and a Big Life Update - #148
|
Mar 04, 2025 |
|
How You Do Anything Is How You Do Everything - #147
|
Feb 18, 2025 |
|
Three Ways I Find Peace When I'm Overwhelmed - #146
|
Feb 11, 2025 |
|
It's Over, But It Wasn't a Waste of Time - #145
|
Feb 04, 2025 |
|
How to Quiet Your Mind and Actually Listen - #144
|
Jan 28, 2025 |
|
The Moment I Realized It Wasn't Him, It Was Me - #143
|
Jan 21, 2025 |
|
Why You Push Love Away When You Want It Most - #142
|
Jan 14, 2025 |
|
Is Venting Quietly Hurting Your Relationship? - #141
|
Jan 07, 2025 |
|
What Worked, What Didn't: A Relationship Review for the New Year - #140
|
Dec 30, 2024 |
|
Always Bracing for Rejection? How Hypervigilance Keeps Love Out - #139
|
Dec 16, 2024 |
|
Misunderstandings and Assumptions: The Two Things Ruining Your Relationship - #138
|
Dec 09, 2024 |
|
A 31-Day Gratitude Practice for Your Relationship - #137
|
Dec 02, 2024 |
|
Why Vulnerability Is the Price of Real Support - #136
|
Nov 25, 2024 |
|
Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop? Say What's on Your Mind - #135
|
Nov 18, 2024 |
|
What Beth and Rip Teach Us About Masculine and Feminine Energy - #134
|
Nov 11, 2024 |
|
How One Honest Conversation Saved an 8-Year Friendship - #133
|
Nov 04, 2024 |
|
How to Face Conflict Without Running Away - #132
|
Oct 31, 2024 |
|
For the Overthinkers: How to Stop the Spiral - #131
|
Oct 28, 2024 |
|
Your Attachment Style Isn't Permanent - #130
|
Oct 21, 2024 |
|
How Your Childhood Shapes the Way You Fight - #129
|
Oct 14, 2024 |
|
Lean Into Gratitude: How It Changes Your Relationship - #128
|
Oct 07, 2024 |
|
What Does Love Mean to You? Your Childhood Decided - #127
|
Oct 01, 2024 |
|
Everything Is an Audition: How You Speak to Your Partner - #126
|
Aug 16, 2024 |
|
Don't Go to Couples Therapy. Do This Instead. - #125
|
Jun 20, 2024 |
|
How Boundaries Help Love Last - #124
|
Jun 07, 2024 |
|
Craft vs. Convenience: Why Good Relationships Take Time - #123
|
May 29, 2024 |
|
Play the Tape Forward: Is This Who You Want Long-Term? - #122
|
May 04, 2024 |
|
My Biggest Frustration When Couples Break Up - #121
|
Apr 05, 2024 |
|
Peace Is an Inside Job - #120
|
Mar 29, 2024 |
|
Workshop: Growth Over Silence
|
Mar 27, 2024 |
|
Men, Are You Regulating or Suppressing Your Emotions? - #119
|
Mar 22, 2024 |
|
Are You Using Jokes to Avoid Your Feelings? - #118
|
Mar 15, 2024 |
|
Why Your Partner Needs the Context, Not Just the Complaint - #117
|
Mar 09, 2024 |
|
Workshop: How to Calm Your Mind
|
Feb 28, 2024 |
|
You Don't Have to Keep Living With Anxiety - #116
|
Feb 23, 2024 |
|
4 Ways Overthinking Keeps You Lonely - #115
|
Feb 16, 2024 |
|
Workshop Replay: “I Can’t Believe This” - The Stages of Grief: Denial
|
Feb 09, 2024 |
|
How to Start Releasing Suppressed Grief - #114
|
Feb 02, 2024 |
|
I'm Angry My Mom Died - #113
|
Jan 26, 2024 |
|
Workshop: Grief Sucks & I'm Confused
|
Jan 20, 2024 |
|
I Miss You and I Don't: Navigating Complicated Grief - #112
|
Jan 20, 2024 |
|
Grief and the Holidays - #111
|
Jan 20, 2024 |
|
Assumptions and Misunderstandings: What Ruins Communication - #110
|
Nov 13, 2023 |
|
Breaking Free From Emotional Loops - #109
|
Nov 06, 2023 |
|
Fighting to Be Right: A Relationship Roadblock - #108
|
Oct 30, 2023 |
|
Are You Quietly Quitting Your Relationship? - #107
|
Oct 23, 2023 |
|
7 Keys to Healthy Communication - #106
|
Oct 02, 2023 |
|
Stop Saying "I'm Fine" When You're Not - #105
|
Sep 18, 2023 |
|
Are You Microdosing on Your Ex? - #104
|
Sep 11, 2023 |
|
Letting Your Partner (and Yourself) Evolve - #103
|
Aug 21, 2023 |
|
Healing Where You Are - #102
|
Aug 01, 2023 |
|
The Campsite Principle: Leave People Better Than You Found Them - #101
|
Jun 26, 2023 |
|
Beneath the Ice: Grooming and Sexual Abuse in Youth Sports - #100
|
Jun 05, 2023 |
|
How You Get Rid of Things Matters - #99
|
May 22, 2023 |
|
Do You Need an Emotional Demo Day? - #98
|
May 04, 2023 |
|
What Your Physical Space Says About Your Emotional State - #97
|
Apr 17, 2023 |
|
Are You Destination- or Journey-Minded? - #96
|
Apr 10, 2023 |
|
Is Relational Dedication Dead? - #95
|
Mar 27, 2023 |
|
What Truly Creates Deep Connection - #94
|
Mar 20, 2023 |
|
How to Process Uncomfortable Emotions - #93
|
Mar 13, 2023 |
|
Becoming an Optimist Through Gratitude - #92
|
Feb 27, 2023 |
|
Why Pursue Growth Even If Your Partner Isn't on Board - #91
|
Feb 20, 2023 |
|
Dealing With Overwhelm, with Laurie Gery - #90
|
Feb 06, 2023 |
|
The 2 Missing Pieces in Communication: Wounds and Energy - #89
|
Jan 30, 2023 |
|
Finding Joy After Divorce, with Heidi Bee - #88
|
Jan 23, 2023 |
|
5 Things Quietly Harming Your Relationship - #87
|
Jan 16, 2023 |
|
Why You Need a Mentor, with January Donovan - #86
|
Jan 09, 2023 |
|
Check On Your Happy Friends - #85
|
Dec 15, 2022 |
|
Why Other Perspectives Matter in Conflict - #84
|
Dec 08, 2022 |
|
What's Your Communication Blueprint? - #83
|
Dec 01, 2022 |
|
Showing Up for a Grieving Friend, with Jillian Flodstrom - #82
|
Nov 28, 2022 |
|
How to Build a Gratitude Practice That Works - #81
|
Nov 24, 2022 |
|
Losing $1.2 Million and Growing Through It, with Jerremy Newsome - #80
|
Nov 21, 2022 |
|
Words Rooted in Fear vs. Words Rooted in Love - #79
|
Nov 17, 2022 |
|
Imposter Syndrome and Reinvention, with John Mollura - #78
|
Nov 14, 2022 |
|
Friends Over Followers - #77
|
Nov 10, 2022 |
|
Growth Over Comfort, with Carli Kahl - #76
|
Nov 07, 2022 |
|
Stay Curious in Your Relationship - #75
|
Nov 03, 2022 |
|
Adaptive Child vs. Functional Adult - #74
|
Oct 27, 2022 |
|
Codependence, Hyperindependence, and Climbing Together - #73
|
Oct 20, 2022 |
|
Postpartum OCD and Supporting Women, with Dr. Shahana Alibhai - #72
|
Oct 17, 2022 |
|
How I Ground Myself When I'm Overwhelmed - #71
|
Oct 13, 2022 |
|
Emptying Your Emotional Trash Can, with Heidi Gruss - #70
|
Oct 10, 2022 |
|
Why Reflective Responses Calm Conflict - #69
|
Oct 06, 2022 |
|
Rewiring Limiting Beliefs, with Dr. Alice Penn - #68
|
Oct 03, 2022 |
|
Words Matter: How to De-Escalate a Fight - #67
|
Sep 29, 2022 |
|
Why Service Is the Missing Key to Fulfillment, with Anton Gunn - #66
|
Sep 26, 2022 |
|
Why I Believe in Going First in Conflict - #65
|
Sep 22, 2022 |
|
Finding Joy Through a Brain Tumor, with Johanna White - #64
|
Sep 19, 2022 |
|
Holding Space for Someone Who's Grieving - #63
|
Sep 15, 2022 |
|
Trading Comfort for Calling, with Dr. Justin Moseley - #62
|
Sep 12, 2022 |
|
A Mindset Morning Routine - #61
|
Sep 08, 2022 |
|
Helping Kids Build Confidence Through Movement, with Philip Laslett - #60
|
Sep 05, 2022 |
|
How to Find Your G.P.S. - #59
|
Sep 01, 2022 |
|
Finding Your G.P.S. in Life, with Juan Alvarado - #58
|
Aug 29, 2022 |
|
Climbing the Vibrational Ladder - #57
|
Aug 25, 2022 |
|
Healing Body and Mind Through Mindset, with Johanna Buchweitz - #56
|
Aug 22, 2022 |
|
Choosing Your Vibration (An RV Story) - #55
|
Aug 18, 2022 |
|
Sobriety, Fulfillment, and Joy, with Ed Howie - #54
|
Aug 15, 2022 |
|
Are They Questioning You, or Just Asking a Question? - #53
|
Jun 27, 2022 |
|
Boundaries With Yourself - #52
|
May 24, 2022 |
|
*Welcome to Growth over Easy
|
May 24, 2022 |
|
Let Grief Flow - #51
|
Feb 06, 2022 |
|
Talk to Me Like You Love Me - #50
|
Jan 31, 2022 |
|
I Choose This Because I Want That - #49
|
Jan 19, 2022 |
|
Pay Yourself First - #48
|
Jan 11, 2022 |
|
What You Put Up With, You End Up With - #47
|
Dec 17, 2021 |
|
Let's Get International: A Life Update - #46
|
Dec 15, 2021 |
|
Owning Your Behaviors - #45
|
Jun 15, 2021 |
|
Unbridled Self-Expression: Stop Dumping on Your Partner - #44
|
May 25, 2021 |
|
Mind Monsters: The Stories We Make Up - #43
|
May 18, 2021 |
|
3 Steps to Better Uncomfortable Conversations - #42
|
May 04, 2021 |
|
How Not to Fall for Someone's Potential - #41
|
Apr 20, 2021 |
|
How to Be Less Annoyed With People - #40
|
Apr 13, 2021 |
|
Personal Standards - #39
|
Apr 06, 2021 |
|
Your Heart Is a Muscle: Letting Love In After Loss - #38
|
Mar 30, 2021 |
|
"I Will Handle It": A Mantra for Anxiety - #37
|
Mar 23, 2021 |
|
Leaky Boundary Syndrome - #36
|
Mar 16, 2021 |
|
Stop Saying "You Made Me" - #35
|
Mar 09, 2021 |
|
How to Move Through Uncomfortable Feelings - #34
|
Mar 02, 2021 |
|
Internal vs. External Processors - #33
|
Feb 23, 2021 |
|
The Pause Tool - #32
|
Feb 16, 2021 |
|
Gut Instinct or Old Trauma? - #31
|
Feb 09, 2021 |
|
Sadness vs. Depression - #30
|
Feb 02, 2021 |
|
Fights, Arguments, or Conversations? - #29
|
Jan 26, 2021 |
|
Visualize Your Ideal Relationship - #28
|
Jan 19, 2021 |
|
Schedule Your Freak Out - #27
|
Jan 12, 2021 |
|
The Four Horsemen - #26
|
Jan 05, 2021 |
|
Releasing Into 2021 - #25
|
Dec 29, 2020 |
|
Merry Christmas
|
Dec 22, 2020 |
|
The "I Will Tell You" Policy - #24
|
Dec 15, 2020 |
|
Social Media Detox - #23
|
Dec 08, 2020 |
|
Too Much Personal Growth? - #22
|
Dec 01, 2020 |
|
Giving Yourself Space and Grace to Grieve - #21
|
Nov 17, 2020 |
|
Give People the Space to Feel - #20
|
Nov 10, 2020 |
|
Language Matters: "And" Instead of "But" - #19
|
Nov 03, 2020 |
|
The 7-Second Silence Rule - #18
|
Oct 27, 2020 |
|
Compliment Your Partner - #17
|
Oct 20, 2020 |
|
Hiking Wisdom - #16
|
Oct 13, 2020 |
|
Empathy Is Your Secret Weapon in Conflict - #15
|
Oct 06, 2020 |
|
Why Do Healthy Relationships Feel Boring? - #14
|
Sep 29, 2020 |
|
Look for the Good - #13
|
Sep 22, 2020 |
|
Micro Goals - #12
|
Sep 15, 2020 |
|
Suicide Prevention: What to Say and What Not to Say - #11
|
Sep 08, 2020 |
|
Leading With Your Feelings - #10
|
Sep 01, 2020 |
|
A 10-Step Road Map Through the Hard Stuff - #9
|
Aug 25, 2020 |
|
5 Ways to Become a Better Listener - #8
|
Aug 18, 2020 |
|
Asking for Help - #7
|
Aug 11, 2020 |
|
Navigating Conflict - #6
|
Aug 04, 2020 |
|
Unverbalized Expectations - #5
|
Jul 28, 2020 |
|
Replacing Negative Thoughts - #4
|
Jul 21, 2020 |
|
Cultivating Self-Awareness - #3
|
Jul 14, 2020 |
|
Identifying Your Core Values - #2
|
Jul 14, 2020 |
|
What Is Eat Your Peas? - #1
|
Jul 14, 2020 |
|
Trailer
|
Jun 16, 2020 |