Playing With Fire
By Joli Hamilton
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Category: Relationships
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Subscribers: 21
Reviews: 0
Episodes: 233
Description
Welcome to Playing With Fire, the podcast for people who are ready to custom-build their love.
We’re talking about non-monogamy–however you design it–as an individuation opportunity.
Want to leave the default and make your life spectacularly you? You’re in the right place.
| Episode | Date |
|---|---|
|
234 How to Figure Out What You Want (And Why It’s So Damn Hard)
|
Dec 13, 2025 |
|
233 The Case for ‘Boring’ Polyamory
|
Dec 06, 2025 |
|
232 How to Keep Going When Non-Monogamy Feels Too Hard
|
Nov 29, 2025 |
|
231 The Holiday Survival Guide for Polyamorous People
|
Nov 22, 2025 |
|
230 Can Trauma Survivors Do Non-Monogamy?
|
Nov 15, 2025 |
|
229 Shadow Work in Relationships: What We Keep From Ourselves
|
Nov 08, 2025 |
|
228 “I Only Get the Hard Parts”: Living with Asymmetry in Polyamory and Life
|
Nov 01, 2025 |
|
227 Transforming Shame into Love with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
|
Oct 25, 2025 |
|
226 The Secret Sauce of Happy Non-Monogamy: Exquisite Transition Management
|
Oct 18, 2025 |
|
225 Fears, Hopes, and Aftercare: Preparing for Polycule Gatherings
|
Oct 11, 2025 |
|
224 Relationship Anarchy with Dr. Nicole Thompson
|
Oct 04, 2025 |
|
223 Recovering From Purity Culture with Lauren Elise Barnes
|
Sep 27, 2025 |
|
222 The Greater the Tension, the Greater the Potential: Individuating in Relationships
|
Sep 20, 2025 |
|
221 The Art of Reassurance: Relating Through Doubt and Fear
|
Sep 13, 2025 |
|
220 How to Finally Hear Each Other: Low vs. High Context Communication
|
Sep 06, 2025 |
|
219 A Patient Path into Non-Monogamy with Laura & Bill
|
Aug 30, 2025 |
|
218 What will opening up do to us?
|
Aug 23, 2025 |
|
217 Jealous right now? Listen to this.
|
Aug 16, 2025 |
|
216 Helping Your Partner Through an Intense Moment of Jealousy
|
Aug 09, 2025 |
|
215 Nurturing Established Relationship Energy
|
Aug 02, 2025 |
|
214 Defying Mononormativity with @Polyamarla
|
Jul 26, 2025 |
|
213 Psychedelics and Non-Monogamy with Dr. Nicole Thompson
|
Jul 19, 2025 |
|
212 Repair Skills
|
Jul 12, 2025 |
|
211 The Drama Triangle: How to Get Unstuck From Your Sticky Fights
|
Jul 05, 2025 |
|
210 Non-Monogamy Firsts: Managing Emotions When Your Partner Explores New Experiences
|
Jun 28, 2025 |
|
209 Transitioning from Swinging to Polyamory
|
Jun 21, 2025 |
|
208 Relationship Anarchy: Tailor-Making ALL Your Relationships with Annie Undone
|
Jun 14, 2025 |
|
207 Turning Goals into Self-Agreements
|
Jun 07, 2025 |
|
206 The Grief of Jealousy
|
May 31, 2025 |
|
205 Hierarchy or Priority?
|
May 24, 2025 |
|
204 Liminality: Your Key to Relationship Paradigm Shifting
|
May 17, 2025 |
|
203 Money & Non-monogamy: Skip This Episode at Your Own Peril
|
May 10, 2025 |
|
202 How do we maintain the relationship renaissance after opening up?
|
May 03, 2025 |
|
201 Lots of fish in the sea, how do I find mine?
|
Apr 26, 2025 |
|
200 Episodes Strong: What We've Learned About Love, Business, and Growth
|
Apr 19, 2025 |
|
199 Why Verbal Agreements Suck (And Why We Still Use Them)
|
Apr 12, 2025 |
|
198 Why does jealousy freak out the nervous system?
|
Apr 05, 2025 |
|
197 I Want What They’ve Got: Feeling Envy Towards Your Partner
|
Mar 29, 2025 |
|
196 Envy: How to Use It and How to Lose It
|
Mar 22, 2025 |
|
195 Help, I’ve Struck Gold: Handling NRE in Two Relationships
|
Mar 15, 2025 |
|
194 Reimagining Relationships
|
Mar 08, 2025 |
|
193 Beyond Good Intentions: Building True Integrity in Relationships
|
Mar 01, 2025 |
|
192 [Replay] What would you do with your full power? A conversation about kink, power exchange, and everyday life with Mollena Williams-Haas
|
Feb 22, 2025 |
|
191 [Replay] Turn your Toxic Attractions into Psychological Growth with Sunny Megatron
|
Feb 15, 2025 |
|
190 [Replay] Shadow work: What if your monsters were trying to help you live the life you always wanted?
|
Feb 08, 2025 |
|
189 [Replay] Can my attachment style do non-monogamy?
|
Feb 01, 2025 |
|
188 [Replay] Justice Jealousy
|
Jan 25, 2025 |
|
187 [Replay] Imago Dialogue: Transforming Conflict into Connection
|
Jan 18, 2025 |
|
186 Polyamory in the Second Half of Adulthood with Kathy Labriola
|
Jan 11, 2025 |
|
185 Conscious Uncoupling
|
Jan 04, 2025 |
|
184 Q&A Quickie: Why get married?
|
Dec 28, 2024 |
|
183 Pelvic and Sexual Health for Every Body with Dr. Ariana Cesare
|
Dec 21, 2024 |
|
182 Q&A Quickie: What should I do when my partner wants gender-based rules in non-monogamy?
|
Dec 14, 2024 |
|
181 Q&A Quickie: Privacy vs. Transparency—How do I feel safer?
|
Dec 07, 2024 |
|
180 Hyper-Individualism vs Healthy Autonomy: Am I The A**hole?
|
Nov 30, 2024 |
|
179 One Kid’s Reflection on Being Raised by Polyamorous Parents
|
Nov 23, 2024 |
|
178 The One to Share with Your Concerned Family Members
|
Nov 16, 2024 |
|
177 Shadow Dance: Navigating Projections in Relationships
|
Nov 09, 2024 |
|
176 Dismantling Defensiveness
|
Nov 02, 2024 |
|
175 Coming Out as Non-Monogamous: Risks, Rewards, & How To Get Ready
|
Oct 26, 2024 |
|
174 Social Monogamy: The Impact of Maintaining Your Mono-Image
|
Oct 19, 2024 |
|
173 Getting off the Relationship Escalator (Or Choosing Not To)
|
Oct 12, 2024 |
|
172 Grieving Change: A Crucial Relationship Skill
|
Oct 05, 2024 |
|
171 Why Self-Agreements Will Make or Break Your Relationships
|
Sep 28, 2024 |
|
170 Jealousy & Attachment Panic
|
Sep 21, 2024 |
|
169 Q&A Quickie: Why am I having such a hard time sticking to my agreements?
|
Sep 14, 2024 |
|
168 Ethics, Responsibility, and the Changing Landscape of Non-Monogamy with Eve Rickert and Andrea Zanin
|
Sep 07, 2024 |
|
167 Unfuck Your Monomind, Part 2
|
Aug 31, 2024 |
|
166 Q&A Quickie: How do I deal with my anxiety when my partner is on a date?
|
Aug 24, 2024 |
|
165 Monogamy, In This Economy? with Laura Boyle
|
Aug 17, 2024 |
|
164 I HATE THIS: Get Unstuck with Existential Kink (A shadow work method)
|
Aug 10, 2024 |
|
163 Playfulness, Vulnerability, and Parenting with Abbey & Liam from Evolving Love
|
Aug 03, 2024 |
|
162 Non-Monogamy & Community: Real Stories from YOO
|
Jul 27, 2024 |
|
161 Adopting a Polyamorous Lens with Alex Alberto, Author of Entwined
|
Jul 20, 2024 |
|
160 Getting Your Needs Met
|
Jul 13, 2024 |
|
159 Q&A Quickie: How can I handle my resentment that my partner isn’t into what I want?
|
Jul 06, 2024 |
|
158 Desire Discrepancy: What to Do When Your Wants Don’t Align
|
Jun 29, 2024 |
|
157 What Is Compersion? with Author Marie Thouin
|
Jun 22, 2024 |
|
156 Betrayal Trauma & Non-Monogamy
|
Jun 15, 2024 |
|
155 Q&A Quickie: How do we rebuild from lost trust?
|
Jun 08, 2024 |
|
154 Research-Backed Therapy for Non-Monogamous People with Dr. River Farrell
|
Jun 01, 2024 |
|
153 Limerence vs. New Relationship Energy
|
May 25, 2024 |
|
152 How to Take Intentional Relationship Breaks
|
May 18, 2024 |
|
151 Justice Jealousy
|
May 11, 2024 |
|
150 Asymmetric Agreements: How much balance should we strive for?
|
May 04, 2024 |
|
149 Relationship Agreements 101
|
Apr 27, 2024 |
|
148 Can my attachment style do non-monogamy?
|
Apr 20, 2024 |
|
147 How to Build Healthy Differentiation
|
Apr 13, 2024 |
|
146 Will non-monogamy make it possible to stay together?
|
Apr 06, 2024 |
|
145 How can I handle dysregulation in my relationships?
|
Mar 30, 2024 |
|
144 Handling Polyamory Problems: Q&A with Polywise Authors Jessica Fern and David Cooley
|
Mar 16, 2024 |
|
143 Consent, Stronger Relationships, and Hotter Sex in a Changing World with Author Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
|
Mar 02, 2024 |
|
142 Enmeshment: Are you over-functioning in your relationship?
|
Feb 17, 2024 |
|
141 Being Polywise with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
|
Feb 03, 2024 |
|
140 [Replay] Balancing Individuation & Secure Attachment with Polysecure Author Jessica Fern
|
Jan 20, 2024 |
|
139 Hinge Skills Part 2: How to Go From Squeaky Hinge to Skilled Tapestry Weaver
|
Jan 13, 2024 |
|
138 How can I be a better hinge partner?
|
Jan 06, 2024 |
|
137 Handling the Stress of Relational Growth
|
Dec 23, 2023 |
|
136 Help, I got poly-bombed!
|
Dec 16, 2023 |
|
135 Veto Power: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
|
Dec 09, 2023 |
|
134 Agreements, Boundaries, and Consequences
|
Dec 02, 2023 |
|
133 Doing the Relationship Work
|
Nov 25, 2023 |
|
132 Why am I not enough?
|
Nov 18, 2023 |
|
131 De-Escalating Relationships with Care
|
Nov 11, 2023 |
|
130 Turn Your Toxic Attractions Into Psychological Growth with Sunny Megatron
|
Nov 04, 2023 |
|
129 Imago Dialogue: Transforming Conflict into Connection
|
Oct 28, 2023 |
|
128 Unfuck Your Mono-Mind
|
Oct 21, 2023 |
|
127 Comperstruggle: When Jealousy & Compersion Collide with Dr. Marie Thouin
|
Oct 14, 2023 |
|
126 Finding Your People with the Hosts of Normalizing Non-Monogamy, Emma & Fin
|
Oct 07, 2023 |
|
125 The Jealousy Roadmap
|
Sep 23, 2023 |
|
124 Are you ready to bring your whole quirky self to your relationships? with Rachel Wright
|
Sep 09, 2023 |
|
123 Weasel Words and Creating More Intimacy in your Relationships
|
Aug 26, 2023 |
|
122 Get The Skills to Build your Own Relationship - With Guest Expert Carrie Jeroslow
|
Aug 19, 2023 |
|
121 Am I cut out for non-monogamy? Finding safety during your exploration
|
Aug 12, 2023 |
|
120 How do I break through relationship stagnation?
|
Aug 05, 2023 |
|
119 Soft Cock Week with guest expert Michelle Renee
|
Jul 22, 2023 |
|
118 Are there quick and easy ways to manage stress? A: Yes. With guest experts Elisabeth Kristof, Melanie Weller, and Matt Bush
|
Jul 15, 2023 |
|
117 Business and pleasure with Beth Hankes
|
Jul 09, 2023 |
|
116 Mindful Dating with guest expert Marie Thouin
|
Jul 01, 2023 |
|
115 The Nature of Relating with guest expert Megan Bhatia
|
Jun 17, 2023 |
|
114 Non-monogamy is a psychological growth lab: Are you ready?
|
Jun 10, 2023 |
|
113 How to do hard things & build exceptional love with Neuro-Somatic Intelligence expert Elisabeth Kristof
|
Jun 03, 2023 |
|
112 Sex clubs and more with Ashley Weller from What's Your Position podcast
|
May 27, 2023 |
|
111 Build Your Relationship Toolkit with guest experts Dedeker, Emily & Jase of the Multiamory podcast
|
May 20, 2023 |
|
110 How surrogate partner therapy works with guest expert Brian Gibney
|
May 13, 2023 |
|
109 We Opened Up & EEK! What to do when exciting beginnings turn scary
|
May 06, 2023 |
|
108 What would you do with your full power? A conversation about kink, power exchange, and everyday life with Mollena Williams-Haas
|
Apr 29, 2023 |
|
107 Power dynamics for non-kinksters (part 2) How to share power when you were raised to be an entitled jerk & a martyr
|
Apr 17, 2023 |
|
106 The conversation that will change your life: Power dynamics for non-kinksters
|
Apr 08, 2023 |
|
105 Shadow work: What if your monsters were trying to help you live the life you always wanted?
|
Apr 01, 2023 |
|
104 Help! What can I do with all my feelings when my partner is on a date?
|
Mar 25, 2023 |
|
103 How to successfully ask your partner to explore non-monogamy
|
Mar 11, 2023 |
|
102 How to find, create, and enjoy non-monogamous community with guest expert Libby Sinback
|
Mar 04, 2023 |
|
101 Three ways of being polyamorous
|
Feb 25, 2023 |
|
100 Finding relationship happiness through creative projects
|
Feb 18, 2023 |
|
99 Balancing individuation & secure attachment with Polysecure author Jessica Fern
|
Feb 11, 2023 |
|
98 You're *too much*
|
Feb 04, 2023 |
|
97 Jealousy and sexual arousal: getting off on the green-eyed monster!
|
Jan 28, 2023 |
|
96 Which is better: To open from the start or to establish couplehood first?
|
Jan 21, 2023 |
|
95 Envisioning Your Dream Relationship
|
Jan 14, 2023 |
|
94 Romantic Friendships: Subversive & Awesome
|
Jan 07, 2023 |
|
93 [MOST POPULAR EPISODE replay] Relationship agreements in the wild
|
Dec 31, 2022 |
|
92 Finding help and hope during your shift from monogamy to polyamory
|
Dec 24, 2022 |
|
91 How to deal with criticism so it doesn't ruin your relationships with Dr. Jessica Higgins
|
Dec 17, 2022 |
|
90 How to make exciting relationship changes less scary
|
Dec 10, 2022 |
|
89 Which relationship style is right for you? Learn the taxonomy of non-monogamy
|
Dec 03, 2022 |
|
88 How do I build sensual & sexual desire?
|
Nov 26, 2022 |
|
87 Is polyamory practical? with guest Laura Boyle
|
Nov 19, 2022 |
|
86 Stop compromising in your intimate relationships.
|
Nov 12, 2022 |
|
85 How can I feel more compersion? with Dr. Marie Thouin
|
Nov 05, 2022 |
|
84 How to have happier relationships using Neuro-Somatic Intelligence
|
Oct 22, 2022 |
|
83 How to heal from jealousy and envy
|
Oct 15, 2022 |
|
82 Choosing an individuation relationship with or without your partner
|
Oct 08, 2022 |
|
81 Here's why we are Playing with Fire!
|
Oct 01, 2022 |
|
80 Creating conscious, compassionate, open relationships with guest author Kate Loree, LMFT
|
Aug 28, 2022 |
|
79 Expansive Intimacy with Jim Young, The Centered Coach
|
Aug 21, 2022 |
|
78 How, When & Why to Visit a Pleasure-Centered Shop with Beth Hankes from Earth & Salt
|
Aug 14, 2022 |
|
77 Naturally attract the partners you long for with guest Allana Pratt
|
Aug 07, 2022 |
|
75 Leaving purity culture for a life you love - with guest Lauren Elise Barnes
|
Jul 24, 2022 |
|
74 Why is my partner so weird? Wait, why am I so weird?
|
Jul 17, 2022 |
|
73 How to start building a designer relationship
|
Jul 10, 2022 |
|
72 How to be a classy visitor to a strip club with expert guest Elle Stanger, CSE
|
Jul 03, 2022 |
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71 Doing what you said you'd do: When accountability works and when it doesn't
|
Jun 26, 2022 |
|
70 Guest Expert Megan Bhatia: Choosing Polyamory While Raising a Family
|
Jun 19, 2022 |
|
69 The Year Of Opening
|
Jun 12, 2022 |
|
68 Train Your Nervous System to Transform Your Relationships with Elisabeth Kristof
|
Jun 05, 2022 |
|
67 Exploring **Potential** Kinks
|
Apr 24, 2022 |
|
66 Who Started It? The Decision to Open Up
|
Apr 17, 2022 |
|
65 Relationship Agreement Skills - Shared Values & Relationship Purpose
|
Apr 10, 2022 |
|
64 Trust: Building and Rebuilding
|
Apr 03, 2022 |
|
63 Relationship Sabotage
|
Mar 27, 2022 |
|
62 Wounds & Apologies
|
Mar 20, 2022 |
|
61 Relational Individuation: On becoming your Self
|
Mar 13, 2022 |
|
60 Making FUN happen in long term relationships
|
Mar 06, 2022 |
|
59 What do I do with unrequited hots?
|
Mar 01, 2022 |
|
58 Anxiety when you are consensually non-monogamous
|
Feb 20, 2022 |
|
57 Affection and Non-sexual Intimacy
|
Feb 13, 2022 |
|
56 Creative Monogamy
|
Feb 06, 2022 |
|
55 Parenting While Polyamorous
|
Jan 30, 2022 |
|
54 Where do we learn the skills of adult friendships?
|
Jan 02, 2022 |
|
53 How to be happier when big changes threaten your marriage
|
Dec 26, 2021 |
|
52 Sex parties? Yes, sex parties.
|
Dec 19, 2021 |
|
51 Let's optimize our sex lives!
|
Dec 12, 2021 |
|
50 Where is envy secretly kicking your ass?
|
Dec 05, 2021 |
|
49 Using love languages to make the gift-giving season more pleasurable
|
Nov 28, 2021 |
|
48 Keeping sex hot over the long term
|
Nov 21, 2021 |
|
47 Nuanced Conversations in Polyamory: Secondaries, Solos, and Couple's Privilege
|
Nov 14, 2021 |
|
46 How, when, and why to CELEBRATE!
|
Nov 07, 2021 |
|
45 Silent agreement - One person's perspective on a sexless marriage
|
Oct 31, 2021 |
|
44 Three ways porn has brought us closer together
|
Oct 24, 2021 |
|
43 The missing ingredient in boundary work with guest Melissa Hite
|
Oct 17, 2021 |
|
42 It's normal to be a messy human in messy relationships. Really, it is.
|
Oct 10, 2021 |
|
41 Emotional regulation and co-regulation
|
Oct 03, 2021 |
|
40 How to have a productive consensual non-monogamy conversation
|
Sep 26, 2021 |
|
39 I want to be consensually non-monogamous: how do I talk to my partner?
|
Sep 19, 2021 |
|
38 How jealousy was the best thing that ever happened to me
|
Sep 12, 2021 |
|
37 Summer's over... negotiating how we handle getting back to the grind
|
Sep 05, 2021 |
|
36 Vacation sex at home
|
Aug 29, 2021 |
|
35 How not to let your relationship agreement screw up your relationship
|
Aug 22, 2021 |
|
34 Three ways masturbation improves your relationship
|
Aug 15, 2021 |
|
33 Individuation Accelerator: What if we don't keep the same beat in our relationship?
|
Aug 08, 2021 |
|
32 What do I do when my partner's family is driving me crazy?
|
Aug 01, 2021 |
|
31 Threesomes... what to consider before the fun
|
Jul 25, 2021 |
|
30 How to go from off-the-rack to custom-designed relationship
|
Jul 18, 2021 |
|
29 Letting your partner grow at their own pace
|
Jul 04, 2021 |
|
28 Showing up for your partner during heartbreak & grief
|
Jun 20, 2021 |
|
27 Relationship agreements in the wild
|
Jun 06, 2021 |
|
26 Doesn't this person ever leave?
|
May 09, 2021 |
|
25 No, really, who IS this person I love?
|
Apr 25, 2021 |
|
24 Do I really want my lover to see me?
|
Apr 18, 2021 |
|
23 Magic marriage ingredient: Play
|
Mar 28, 2021 |
|
22 Relationship flags - red, green, and otherwise
|
Mar 21, 2021 |
|
21 A secret weapon for relationship satisfaction
|
Mar 14, 2021 |
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20 What an open relationship *might* look like
|
Mar 07, 2021 |
|
19 The shame of a messy beginning
|
Feb 28, 2021 |
|
18 Shame & secrecy (and sex!)
|
Feb 21, 2021 |
|
17 Sexual Fantasies
|
Feb 14, 2021 |
|
16 Relationship agreements and polyamory (or monogamy!)
|
Feb 07, 2021 |
|
15 What does intimacy look like if you are non-monogamous?
|
Jan 31, 2021 |
|
14 Why polyamory?
|
Jan 24, 2021 |
|
13 Celebrating and still learning
|
Dec 29, 2020 |
|
12 Feel like a failure when a relationship ends? 3 tools to help ease life's big transitions
|
Dec 24, 2020 |
|
11 Making money talk-aboutable
|
Dec 22, 2020 |
|
10 Navigating drastically different communication styles
|
Dec 18, 2020 |
|
9 Fighting with love...how we relearned how to argue
|
Dec 15, 2020 |
|
8 Sex reimagined...with one question
|
Dec 10, 2020 |
|
7 How to get what you want for the holiday (or any day!)
|
Dec 08, 2020 |
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6 The courage to want
|
Dec 03, 2020 |
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5 Relationship resilience for the holidays
|
Dec 01, 2020 |
|
4 Who the heck IS this person I love?
|
Nov 26, 2020 |
|
3 Boundaries at the holidays
|
Nov 24, 2020 |
|
2 Empowered relating & holiday stress
|
Nov 18, 2020 |
|
1 Wanting more in love (even at the holidays!)
|
Nov 17, 2020 |