Matthias J Barker Podcast

By Matthias Barker

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Category: Mental Health

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A podcast on moving towards what's meaningful despite hardship.

Episode Date
how to find a good therapist

Free Webinar Next Week!!!

Things to look for when looking for a therapist and things you can do before booking an intake session to increase the probability that therapy will be helpful and fruitful.

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May 23, 2022
is online counseling worse?

a conversation with Dr. Hillary McBride, author of The Wisdom of Your Body, about the effects and lasting impacts of online counseling, including how this affects the relationships between therapist and client, and the impact of video conferencing in modern counseling.

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May 11, 2022

A podcast comparing and contrasting three philosophies of how to “be a man” and how those philosophies conceptualize masculinity and gender. 

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De Beauvoir, S. (2010). The second sex. Knopf.

The section on the feminist split of cultural feminists and the integration of queer-theory can be seen in more detail here:

Halley, J. (2002). A Map of Feminist and Queer Theories of Sexuality and Sexual RegulationYouTube. Retrieved April 7, 2022, from

Costa Jr, P. T., Terracciano, A., & McCrae, R. R. (2001). Gender differences in personality traits across cultures: robust and surprising findings. Journal of personality and social psychology

Much of the argumentation regarding a modernist perspective on gender temperament and how it conflicts with post-modernism is inspired by lectures I’ve heard from Jordan Peterson, Sam Harris, and James Lindsay (all well-known modernists).

Regarding the Jungian theory around the arch of manhood:

Jung, C. G., Von Franz, M. L., Henderson, J. L., Jaffé, A., & Jacobi, J. (1964). Man and his symbols (Vol. 5183). Dell.

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Apr 26, 2022
AMA - happiness, LD relationships, nagging

Secure Spot For April 18th Live Webinar with Matthias J Barker!

A podcast discussing various ways of measuring and conceptualizing happiness, the data on long-term relationships and dynamics to keep in mind, and what exactly "nagging is" and how to go about resolving it. 

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Apr 12, 2022
getting through grief

A conversation with Dr. Julie Smith on Grief and exploring the paradox of needing time to rejuvenate, rest, and distract yourself from the pain, while also needing to open yourself up to feeling the emotions of grief and loss. 

Dr. Julie Smith is a Clinical Psychologist with over a decade of professional experience, having previously worked in the NHS, with veterans and the MoD, in addiction and crisis centres, and now in private practice. She is also an online educator and social media star, sharing bite-sized mental health and motivational videos online, with a combined following of more than 3.5 million. In November 2019 Julie launched her TikTok account to make her services and education about mental health more accessible. During the COVID-19 pandemic, Dr. Julie’s audience on TikTok grew astronomically as young people related to the videos she was making about mental health and put her advice to use.

"Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?" is Dr. Julie’s first book: A mental health toolbox that is filled with ideas, techniques and insights to help you feel calmer, stronger and more resilient, no matter what life throws your way. "Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before" was an instant #1 Sunday Times Bestseller.

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Mar 29, 2022
should I force my kid to eat?

On this "Ask Me Anything" episode, Matthias discusses ways to help your kids finish their vegetables without creating complexes around food restriction.

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Mar 15, 2022
convincing someone to change

A conversation with Motivational Interviewing expert, Casey Jackson, on the process of change and how to come alongside people we love in their process.

Casey has worked in Behavioral health for over 30 years and is a member of the international Motivational Interviewing Network of Trainers (MINT). He is the lead author of the Motivational Interviewing Competency Assessment (MICA) and has presented at many conferences in a wide variety of professional fields for line-level staff as well as administrators and other leadership. He has provided over 2000 trainings on Motivational Interviewing and system change to organizations and professionals in Healthcare, Mental health, Addictions, Corrections/Prisons, Local and state government, and more. View Casey’s Webpage for his experience, story, and testimonials!

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Mar 01, 2022
life update - March 2022

Welcome to SEASON 2 of the Matthias J Barker Podcast! I have exciting announcements! We found out the gender of our second child, we're moving to the southern United States, and I'm excited to share my plans for season 2 of the podcast.

Support my podcast with a cup of coffee and get access to exclusive and ad-free content on Patreon!

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Mar 01, 2022
brain health, alzheimer's and nutrition - Interview with Dr. Daniel Amen

A conversation on the importance of eating well to not just have a healthier brain but have a better life. Pre-order Dr. Amen's new book "You, Happier" releasing March 1st, 2022.

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Dec 21, 2021
marital conflict

A discussion on what makes conflict terrible and how to make it better. This content is a summary of the Gottman’s “four horsemen” research that can be found in their book:

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert

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Nov 23, 2021
becoming a psychotherapist

Thoughts on entering a career in psychology and making online psychological content.

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Nov 09, 2021
if you're struggling with porn

Thoughts on entering a career in psychology and making online psychological content.

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Oct 26, 2021
motivation and trauma

Trauma Workshop:

ACE Quiz:

Statistical data:

Chapman, D. P., Dube, S. R., & Anda, R. F. (2007). Adverse childhood events as risk factors for negative mental health outcomes. Psychiatric Annals, 37(5), 359–364.

The discussion on the findings studying the children of holocaust survivors/mothers who endured trauma and the studies on rat-pups can be found in the introduction of this paper:

Data on Walla Walla school district:

Intro and outro song: "with eyes open" by Cathartic Fall

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Oct 12, 2021
falling back in love

The path to building emotional warmth and intimacy with the person you love.

*Theory of bids derived from the Gottman Method.

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Sep 28, 2021
empathy, sociopaths, and teenagers - Interview with Dr. Frank Anderson

A conversation with Dr. Anderson about IFS, the role of empathy in connection and its applications in our lives.

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Sep 23, 2021

A mindfulness exercise on gratefulness and centering in on your values in the midst of hardship. Song by Cathartic Fall, find him on Spotify!

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Sep 15, 2021
forgiving your parents

A conversation on what parenting is and how to move towards forgiveness.

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Jul 20, 2021
psychology of fame

Why we call celebrities “stars” and complications in pursuing fame.

Inspired by Carl Jung and Jordan Peterson’s lectures.

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Jul 13, 2021
why get married?

A case for marriage and it’s advantages over long term dating.

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Jul 06, 2021
childhood trauma

A reflection on false solutions and real healing from childhood trauma.

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Jun 29, 2021

The interplay of shame and self-criticism and how to find freedom.

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Jun 22, 2021
life update

Its been a while! Here's what I've been up to

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Jun 15, 2021
solving arguments

a method for solving deep core arguments

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Apr 28, 2021
irritation is a teacher

A breakdown of the kinds of personalities that irritate us the most and how to respond.

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Mar 30, 2021
making friends as an adult

Making meaningful connections and developing new relationships into lasting long-term friendships.

Intro song: Tides by Surname

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Mar 24, 2021
healing & embodiment

A discussion with Dr. Hillary McBride on the function of mental health practitioners, healing from trauma, and eating disorders. Look for her new book "The Wisdom of Your Body" in October 2021!

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Mar 16, 2021
empathy is prejudiced

How relying solely on empathy can lead to great harm.

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Mar 08, 2021
(reflection) faith & sexual orientation - Interview with Ben Barker

Reflecting with my younger brother Ben on what it was like posting his coming-out story and having it public for the world to see. Both his emotional journey and the stories he heard from people.

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Mar 01, 2021
faith & sexual orientation - Interview with Ben Barker

A conversation with my younger brother ben about his experience growing up gay in a christian culture.

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Mar 01, 2021
contentment & being open to change - Interview with Dr. Matthieu Villatte

A discussion on the seeming paradox between being in the present moment, making goals for the future, holding contentment, and being open to change. Dr. Villatte is an expert in Relational Frame Theory and is an author for the book: Mastering the Clinical Conversation.

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Feb 22, 2021
bipolar, mindfulness, and christian prayer - Interview with John Mark Comer

An interview with John Mark Comer where we discuss the differences between christian prayer and modern mindfulness, identity formation and my personal history with bipolar II.

Get John Mark's Book: The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry:

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Feb 15, 2021
avoidance & goals

Why avoidance can turn on you and why to face things head on. Reflections from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Jordan Peterson Lectures.

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Feb 10, 2021
what to do if you're suffering - interview with Dr. Steve Hayes

A conversation on Dr. Hayes' work in creating Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and the psychological processes that are involved in thinking about and acting in moments of pain.

Check out his book "A Liberated Mind":

Song "Tides" by Surname

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Feb 01, 2021

A discussion on honesty, refusing to manipulate others and the boundaries that promote this. Many of the ideas were inspired by the work of Cloud and Townsend in their book: Boundaries (2017).

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Jan 26, 2021
loneliness & social media - Interview with Dr. Russell Kolts

Check out Russell Kolts' ted talk:

Also his book:

Also his upcoming workshop:

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Jan 16, 2021
meaning & satisfaction

The 3 psychological categories needed to experience fulfillment. 

Category 1 and 3 are heavily influenced by Matthieu Villette’s 2016 book, Mastering the Clinical Conversation and the work of Victor Frankl on meaning. Category 2 is influenced by @Jordan.b.Peterson’s lectures.

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Jan 13, 2021
motivation & childhood dreams

The connection between childhood wounds, dreams and our motivation.

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Jan 06, 2021
relationship myths

Busting two myths this week when it comes to romance and relationships. Talking about the science of infatuation!

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Dec 29, 2020
should I quit my job?

Dynamics to consider as you reflect on your career during quarantine. Original video was recorded April 2020.

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Dec 23, 2020
the power of one idea

How one wrong idea can have an effect on your entire system of behaviors.

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Dec 23, 2020