WTF is on my Mind?!

By Mark Vicente

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Description

Author, Speaker, Whistleblower and award-winning Director Mark Vicente was behind the sleeper hit “What The Bleep Do We Know?!” Several books have been written about the film’s remarkable grassroots marketing campaign, which led to its unprecedented success.Mark was born in Johannesburg, South Africa in 1965. Taking his first photograph at age four, he quickly discovered his passion for being behind the camera. After attending film and drama school in South Africa, he began working his way up the ranks of the camera department, from Assistant to Operator to Cinematographer. His first big break came as Director of Photography on the musical “SARAFINA,” starring Whoopi Goldberg. In 1992, he set his sights on Hollywood and relocated to Los Angeles to shoot his first studio picture for Disney;  “FATHERHOOD,” starring Patrick Swayze and Halle Berry. At the age of 26, he became one of the youngest cinematographers to shoot a big-budget studio picture. Over the next few decades, he went on to shoot an additional 14 feature films and numerous documentaries, music videos and commercials. Mark soon found there were in him, untold stories he desperately wanted to express as a Director. He was driven by the conviction that tales of greatness, nobility and introspection could be exciting and financially successful. Perhaps because of the very obvious race and class iniquities in South Africa, he found himself propelled to question certain fundamental assumptions at a very young age. Beliefs about human behavior, cosmology, religion, existentialism and mysticism. Along the way, he stumbled into a few situations where leaders with malignant pathologies (masquerading as saintly philosophers) spoke the talk of self-improvement but did untold damage to their followers... and him. Looking back, he can now say he has been in at last two cults. His last foray into personal growth and his defection from NXIVM was chronicled in the HBO series “The Vow”. Mark and a few plucky whistleblowers exposed the criminal activities of the organization, resulting in multiple arrests and indictments. He doesn’t consider himself a cult expert, but by his own admission, “I’m an expert in being screwed over, waking up, and knowing how to spot them.” He’s got a pretty salty approach to most things and is fascinated by the myriad patterns in the human psychodynamic that create the best and the worst in civilization. Join Mark as he unpacks a whole range of topics to do with: Psychology, Consciousness, Morality, Narcissistic Abuse, Spirituality, Cults, Propaganda, Science, Filmmaking, and Philosophy.You never quite know what you’re going to get, as it really does depend on… WTF is on his mind?!

Episode Date
'The Vow' S2 - Episode 6 - Debrief
7164

SPOILER ALERT! Scenes from Episode 6 will be discussed!

In this Episode: Debrief of 'The Vow' Season 2 - Episode 6

(NXIVM) ‘Letter to the Inside’ in 4 parts is available on all Podcast platforms and Youtube. 

'The Vow' Opening Title Sequence Music
Son Lux – "Dream State (Run From It) [feat. Bonnie Piesse]" (Official Audio)

A Little Bit Culty Podcast
https://www.instagram.com/alittlebitculty/

Consent Awareness Network
#FGKIA: Freely Given, Knowledgeable Informed Agreement
https://www.instagram.com/standfirmvoice/

Mark Vicente YouTube - Holy Deception
Mark Vicente - Statement at Raniere's Sentencing
Mark Vicente - Statement at Nancy Salzman's Sentencing


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Nov 22, 2022
'The Vow' S2 - Episode 5 - Debrief
3118

SPOILER ALERT! Scenes from Episode 5 will be discussed!

In this Episode: Debrief of 'The Vow' Season 2 - Episode 5

Daniel Shaw, LCSW
Traumatic Narcissism and Recovery - Leaving the Prison of Shame and Fear

End Titles Episode 5: "Regret" sung by Bonnie Piesse; co-written with Reinhold Heil, Michael Tuller and Mac Quayle. 

(NXIVM) ‘Letter to the Inside’ in 4 parts is available on all Podcast platforms and Youtube. 

'The Vow' Opening Title Sequence Music
Son Lux – "Dream State (Run From It) [feat. Bonnie Piesse]" (Official Audio)

A Little Bit Culty Podcast
https://www.instagram.com/alittlebitculty/

Consent Awareness Network
#FGKIA: Freely Given, Knowledgeable Informed Agreement
https://www.instagram.com/standfirmvoice/

Mark Vicente YouTube - Holy Deception
Mark Vicente - Statement at Raniere's Sentencing
Mark Vicente - Statement at Nancy Salzman's Sentencing


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Nov 15, 2022
'The Vow' S2 - Episode 4 - Debrief
3406

SPOILER ALERT! Scenes from Episode 4 will be discussed! 

In this Episode: Debrief of 'The Vow' Season 2 - Episode 4.

End Title Music: "Unraveling" by Bonnie Piesse
Music and Lyrics by Bonnie Piesse
Produced by Bonnie Piesse and Eric Margen

Lyrics
everything 
everything is wrong 
there's nothing left 
of how we knew it 
breaking down all the crooked lines 
unraveling 

everything 
everything is gone 
there's no way back 
you can't erase 
memories are falling to ground 
spiraling 

it's who you 
who you are 
not who you believe in 

packing up and leaving in the night 
the only way of getting through it 
it's over now 
I think I see the light 
beckoning 

it's who you 
who you are 
not who you believe in 

it's who you 
who you are 
not who you believe in 
it's who you 
who you are 
not who you believe in 

(NXIVM) ‘Letter to the Inside’ in 4 parts is available on all Podcast platforms and Youtube. 


'The Vow' Opening Title Sequence Music
Son Lux – "Dream State (Run From It) [feat. Bonnie Piesse]" (Official Audio)

A Little Bit Culty Podcast
https://www.instagram.com/alittlebitculty/

Consent Awareness Network
#FGKIA: Freely Given, Knowledgeable Informed Agreement
https://www.instagram.com/standfirmvoice/

Mark Vicente YouTube - Holy Deception
Mark Vicente - Statement at Raniere's Sentencing
Mark Vicente - Statement at Nancy Salzman's Sentencing


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Nov 08, 2022
(NXIVM) Letter to the Inside - Part 4 of 4
1992

In this Episode: (PART 4 of 4) In March 2018 I recognized Keith Raniere was about to be arrested. Along with my fellow whistleblowers, we had spent the previous 9 months trying to get people out of NXIVM. I made one final attempt en masse to get my friends (true believers) to wake up before Raniere was arrested. I wrote a long letter to a select few friends on ‘the inside’ on March 10th, 2018 - 16 days before Keith Raniere was arrested in a Mexican Villa on March 26th, 2018. I sent it mostly to lower ranks because I knew that if I included the top of the organization, the higher ranks would have blocked it. I needed my friends who received the letter to have time to absorb what I was saying before they had to report it up the chain of command. This was my desperate attempt to try and wake my friends up before the arrests began. ~ Mark Vicente 

Sections of the letter: Shunning, Whistleblower, The Blame Game, The Appearance of Calm, VWEEK2016, Slavery. Remember Africa, The Enablers, Your Future Selves


"Mirreyes" (my kings)
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3026433/Mirreyes-rich-kids-Mexican-elite-use-Instagram-wealth.html


Your Future Selves. 

Well, my rant has come to an end. As I said, that is 0.5%. I am well aware that this LONG letter may not move any of you. Too many EM’s and The Knife. Also, some of you may be True Believers. But at least we can collectively never look back and say I didn’t express this. That I didn’t try. I am writing this hopefully to your future selves who will look back at this, maybe years from now and say HOLY SHIT! It was right in front of me!  More and more information will be disclosed that will startle many of you. At first you will be convinced it is all part of the big bad conspiracy against your beloved Lord and Master and his 'innocent’ minions. But the revelations will grow and grow and be more and more shocking. Then you will have to face the horror as well, as many of us have. It will take significant decompression and time. We will be here when that day comes. We will help you. 


You may never talk to me as long as you live, and you likely won’t, but do ONE thing. Read ONE book: 


"Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships" 

By Janja Lalich and Madeleine Landau Tobias 

It will change your life. It may even save your life. 

I miss many of you deeply. 

 

All my love, 

Mark 


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Nov 05, 2022
'The Vow' S2 - Episode 3 - Debrief
3190

SPOILER ALERT! Scenes from Episode 3 will be discussed!  WARNING! I discuss the ‘Fright Experiments’. Extreme Violence is mentioned.

In this Episode: Debrief of 'The Vow' Season 2 - Episode 3.

A South African accent...
https://www.tiktok.com/@samihallsays?lang=en
https://www.instagram.com/samihall/ 


Bridge over the River Kwai (1957)
Directed by David Lean
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bridge_on_the_River_Kwai 

(NXIVM) ‘Letter to the Inside’ in 4 parts is available on all Podcast platforms and Youtube.

'The Vow' Opening Title Sequence Music
Son Lux – "Dream State (Run From It) [feat. Bonnie Piesse]" (Official Audio)

A Little Bit Culty Podcast
https://www.instagram.com/alittlebitculty/

Consent Awareness Network
#FGKIA: Freely Given, Knowledgeable Informed Agreement
https://www.instagram.com/standfirmvoice/

Mark Vicente YouTube - Holy Deception
Mark Vicente - Statement at Raniere's Sentencing
Mark Vicente - Statement at Nancy Salzman's Sentencing


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Nov 01, 2022
(NXIVM) Letter to the Inside - Part 3 of 4
1269

In this Episode: (PART 3 of 4) In March 2018 I recognized Keith Raniere was about to be arrested. Along with my fellow whistleblowers, we had spent the previous 9 months trying to get people out of NXIVM. I made one final attempt en masse to get my friends (true believers) to wake up before Raniere was arrested. I wrote a long letter to a select few friends on ‘the inside’ on March 10th, 2018 - 16 days before Keith Raniere was arrested in a Mexican Villa on March 26th, 2018. I sent it mostly to lower ranks because I knew that if I included the top of the organization, the higher ranks would have blocked it. I needed my friends who received the letter to have time to absorb what I was saying before they had to report it up the chain of command. This was my desperate attempt to try and wake my friends up before the arrests began. ~ Mark Vicente 

Sections of the letter: Nancy Salzman, The Mantra, Permanent state of Terror, Mark Vicente's wife is a horrible abuser, Emotional Barrier 


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Oct 29, 2022
'The Vow' S2 - Episode 2 - Debrief
4400
Oct 25, 2022
(NXIVM) Letter to the Inside - Part 2 of 4
1174

In this Episode: (PART 2 of 4) In March 2018 I recognized Keith Raniere was about to be arrested. Along with my fellow whistleblowers, we had spent the previous 9 months trying to get people out of NXIVM. I made one final attempt en masse to get my friends (true believers) to wake up before Raniere was arrested. I wrote a long letter to a select few friends on ‘the inside’ on March 10th, 2018 - 16 days before Keith Raniere was arrested in a Mexican Villa on March 26th, 2018. I sent it mostly to lower ranks because I knew that if I included the top of the organization, the higher ranks would have blocked it. I needed my friends who received the letter to have time to absorb what I was saying before they had to report it up the chain of command. This was my desperate attempt to try and wake my friends up before the arrests began. ~ Mark Vicente 

Sections of the letter: Mastermind, The Tech, Abandon Morality, Mysticism.

"I've been doing this work for many years. I am nevertheless aghast at the level of contempt for women and cruelty toward women that is at the rotten core of this group. Raniere succeeds in fulfilling his sadistic need to enslave others through a kind of battering, his twisted rationales convincing followers, and not just the women, that self-torture and torture of others builds character.  In fact, what he does is utterly self-serving, exploiting others entirely to feed the delusion of his own omnipotence. Those who have been brainwashed with Raniere's hateful ideas about women will need time to free themselves from their conditioning, to be able to respect and trust themselves again."  ~ Daniel Shaw, LCSW


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Oct 21, 2022
'The Vow' S2 - Episode 1 - Debrief
3296
Oct 19, 2022
(NXIVM) Letter to the Inside - Part 1 of 4
2407

In this Episode: (PART 1 of 4) In March 2018 I recognized Keith Raniere was about to be arrested. Along with my fellow whistleblowers, we had spent the previous 9 months trying to get people out of NXIVM. I made one final attempt en masse to get my friends (true believers) to wake up before Raniere was arrested. I wrote a long letter to a select few friends on ‘the inside’ on March 10th, 2018 - 16 days before Keith Raniere was arrested in a Mexican Villa on March 26th, 2018. I sent it mostly to lower ranks because I knew that if I included the top of the organization, the higher ranks would have blocked it. I needed my friends who received the letter to have time to absorb what I was saying before they had to report it up the chain of command. This was my desperate attempt to try and wake my friends up before the arrests began. ~ Mark Vicente 

Sections of the letter: Grab a glass of wine, An Unspoken Credo, The Illuminati, Pam’s Death, Sudden Disappearance?, Multiple Attempts 

I began my  "Whistleblower Blog' on my website a few days before the New York Times broke the explosive article on October 17th, 2017 (Exactly 5 years before 'The VOW - Part II airs on HBO) It was my attempt to leave breadcrumbs for my friends who were trying to figure out what was going on. 

These are the links to the blog I referenced in the letter:

(Read my blog starting on Episode 1 to understand ‘word-salad’) Episode 1 & 2 below: 

http://www.markvicente.com/whistleblower/2017/10/12/how-the-bleep-did-that-happen-episode-1 

http://www.markvicente.com/whistleblower/2017/10/17/how-the-bleep-did-that-happen-episode-2

I didn’t realize at the time I was caught in what I now understand as 'Stage 7'.  You can read about it on my blog: 

http://www.markvicente.com/whistleblower/2017/10/24/how-the-bleep-did-that-happen-episode-9 

"At this stage, some people try to reason with the leaders. They will either arrange for visits or write long agonizing letters. Some hope that they can change the system or get some to agree with them. They are AMAZED at the total inability of leaders to hear what they are saying. However, some will agree with their arguments, pat them on the head and try to smooth their ruffled feelings." 


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Oct 16, 2022
Episode 4 - 'The Vow' Season 1 - Q&A
3630

In this episode: Answering questions about 'The Vow'Season 1 and an ANNOUNCEMENT about multipart WTF podcast episodes that will drop during the release of 'The Vow' Season 2 on HBOMax.

'The Vow' Season 2 will start airing on October 17th, 2022 on HBO.
Website: https://www.hbo.com/the-vow

ESP (NXIVM) Mission Statement
https://www.markvicente.com/esp-mission-statement


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Oct 09, 2022
Episode 3 - Spiritual Bypassing
957

In this episode: What is Spiritual Bypassing? The problem with 'being above it all'. Dissociating from difficult feelings. Robert Augustus Masters write a book on Spiritual Bypassing, then abused his students. Toxic positivity protects abusers. The inability to acknowledge darkness. Teachers who haven't dealt with their psychological shit. Creating a kind of hell for yourself because you're not allowed to feel human. No compassion for self or others. Magically changing timelines to another reality? The only way 'out' is in. At 'Rock Bottom' you can't pretend anymore.
 

Spiritual Bypassing: When Spirituality Disconnects Us From What Really Matters
Spiritual bypassing—the use of spiritual practices/beliefs to avoid dealing with painful feelings, unresolved wounds, and developmental needs—is so pervasive that it goes largely unnoticed. In the tradition of the landmark book Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism by Chögyam Trungpa, Spiritual Bypassing casts a lucidly critical eye on our deeply entrenched misuse of spirituality, furthering the body of psychological/spiritual insight into how we use (and abuse) spirituality. https://www.robertmasters.com/book/spiritual-bypassing/

Robert Augustus Masters: Clarifying My Past
From 1986 to 1994 I led an experimental psychospiritual community that gradually became a cult. I called myself its guide but was more its director and centerpiece. More often than I’d like to admit, I was arrogant, aggressive, and misused my power, and those in the community paid the price for this. Everyone was caught up in my dream of a new kind of tribalism. https://www.robertmasters.com/about-robert/robert-augustus-masters-clarifying-my-past/

Spiritual bypassing, Christian bypassing, Stoic bypassing
https://www.philosophyforlife.org/blog/spiritual-bypassing-christian-bypassing-stoic-bypassing


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Oct 05, 2022
Episode 2 - F*ck Adversity
1095

In this episode: Getting into the cold ocean and disillusionment with the principle of "pushing against adversity". The ESP/NXIVM Credo to overcome the body and vilify comfort. Satiation was deemed weak and unprincipled. An entire intensive dedicated to proving that true love = the ability to withstand pain. Calorie counting and skinniness are a requirement for virtue and nobility.  And finally, redefining pushing against adversity and embracing the suck. Beware of the intent of the leader pushing you to relinquish your instinct.


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Oct 02, 2022
Episode 1 - Introduction
818

In this episode: Starting this podcast. A lot of important things to talk about. Regarding: "The Vow". Releasing certain things that never came out. Requests from friends.


Website: www.markvicente.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/markvicente
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
Music: "In Time" by Kollen

Sep 30, 2022