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Being Brave: Coming Out as a Successful Relationship Coach
On today’s episode of The Successful Relationship Coach Podcast, I’m coming out from behind the curtain.
I share why I don’t want my pain to go to waste and what I did to cause more transformation in my personal life, my marriage and my career than anything else I had ever tried.
|Nov 23, 2022|
Ending World Divorce with Successful Relationship Coaches
BIG ANNOUNCEMENT: YOUR PRESENT AND PODCAST
For my birthday today, I have a present for you and every relationship coach who wants to have a more playful, passionate relationship and help others have the same.
Presenting...THE SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP COACH PODCAST.
Where it’s all about becoming a wildly successful relationship coach without having to work 24/7 so you can prosper, have the relationship you want and make an impact in the world.
I’m sharing all my best stuff and it’s completely free!
Episode #1 is all about ending world divorce with successful relationship coaches.
I share exactly what I did to single-handedly turn my marriage around and make it passionate and gratifying again. You’ll hear why my marriage story went viral when I shared it on the BBC and how I helped build a multimillion dollar coaching organization where I’ve empowered thousands of women to have vibrant happy marriages and hundreds of coaches to become wildly successful.
The very best way to wish me a happy birthday is by leaving an honest 5-star review of The Successful Relationship Coach Podcast on Apple Podcasts. Thanks!
I’m Master Relationship Coach Kathy Murray and Creator of Next-Level Coaching. I’ve helped thousands of women fix their marriages and hundreds of relationship coaches become wildly successful while increasing their intimacy, impact and income.
But it wasn’t always that way.
At first, I couldn’t help anybody with their marriage because I couldn’t even save my own marriages–the first one fell apart and my second marriage was looking bleak. And I wasn’t trained in coaching, or relationships. All my training was in accounting. I had a good, safe job as a Chief Financial Officer of a prestigious private school, where I made a lot of money and supported my family. I couldn’t see giving that up. We depended on the money!
So it’s kind of crazy how I ended up becoming one of the best relationship coaches in the world then helped empower hundreds of relationship coaches to become wildly successful.
|Nov 22, 2022|
Trailer: The Successful Relationship Coach Podcast
Welcome to the Successful Relationship Coach podcast where it’s all about becoming a wildly successful relationship coach without having to work 24/7. So you can prosper, have the relationship you want and make an impact in the world. This is about learning to do less, not more.
I’m Master Relationship Coach Kathy Murray and the Creator of Next Level Coaching. I’ve helped thousands of women fix their marriages and hundreds of relationship coaches become successful relationship coaches while increasing their intimacy, impact and income, but it wasn’t always that way.
At first, I couldn’t help anybody with their marriage because I couldn’t even save my own marriages–the first one fell apart and my second marriage was looking bleak. And I wasn’t trained in coaching, or relationships. All my training was in accounting. I had a good, safe job as a Chief Financial Officer of a prestigious private school where I made a lot of money and supported my family. I couldn’t see giving that up. We depended on the money!
So it’s kind of crazy how I ended up becoming one of the best relationship coaches in the world, and then helped empower hundreds of relationship coaches to become wildly successful.
I Thought It Was All His Fault
My husband and I fought about everything all the time.
Every day I told him what to wear, what to do professionally and around the house. I controlled all the money–how we spent it and invested. I would even redo the laundry he had folded or the way he’d set up the online banking because I didn’t think he had done it right.
He responded by shouting. Our home was tense and volatile, but I was sure that if Doug would only see things my way we could save our marriage.
I started going to therapy, where I would complain about how much I resented him because he never took initiative. I was exhausted from working full time, managing the household budget, and raising four children and my husband too!
There was so much distance between us that we slept in separate bedrooms. I was lonely, unhappy and devastated by the thought of a second divorce, but I also felt powerless to fix things.
I thought our failing marriage was entirely my husband’s fault, just like I believed that my first divorce was entirely my first husband’s fault.
It turns out I did have the power to save my marriage--and even to make it blissful again.
One night, I was complaining about Doug to my girlfriend--again--when she shocked me by saying, “Either shut up or else get a divorce.”
I was devastated. I booked a flight to visit my mother. I knew she would listen, and she would know what I should do.
I brought some books with me. One of them was The Surrendered Wife. Upon reading that book, I felt ashamed and embarrassed. For the first time, I realized that I was responsible for my failed marriages.
It was very painful. I sobbed that night and all the next day. I felt that Laura Doyle understood my pain because she had made the same mistakes and still saved her marriage.
But under my pain, I felt a glimmer of hope.
When I returned, I decided to experiment. When Doug asked which cell phone service plan to pick, I said, “Whatever you think.” Those were completely foreign words to me, but I wanted to test the principles I’d read in Laura’s book, so I just said what she suggested.
My husband was nervous because he was sure he would blow it and hear about it from me later, so he asked again, “No, really--what should I do?”
I said, “Whatever you think. I trust you to make that decision.”
That night we crawled into bed together for the first time in months, and Doug said, “Boy, you have been so nice tonight.”
Tears rolled down my cheeks as I thought, “Oh my gosh! This works!” I felt like I turned my marriage around in one night. That was in 2001. I fired my therapist and hired Laura Doyle for coaching instead.
I let go of how my husband managed his life, the kids and chores, and I started taking better care of myself. I even handed over the chore of managing the finances, which my husband took on because he wanted to please me.
Soon we were blissfully happy again--just like when we’d met. He surprises me with presents and romantic trips. And this is as our 27th anniversary approaches!
It seemed so simple once I learned the 6 Intimacy Skills™.
If you feel like you are in charge or you’re lonely or you can’t figure out why your husband no longer pays attention to you, I certainly know what that’s like. I had a blind spot worth uncovering to restore the intimacy in my marriage.
What made all the difference was investing in myself, seeking support and surrounding myself with a group of like-minded women. Now I’m on a journey to end world divorce empowering coaches to do the same.
|Nov 17, 2022|