The B Movie Beatdown
By Jordan & Alicia
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Category: Film Reviews
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Subscribers: 3
Reviews: 0
Episodes: 150
Description
Sleeper Hits and Midnight Misses
Jordan and Alicia, and sometimes Peter, cover humanity's finest films, and a fair share of flops. New episodes every Tuesday
| Episode | Date |
|---|---|
|
Ep. 137 - All Hallows Eve (2013): Spider is A Politician Now
|
Nov 03, 2026 |
|
Ep. 137 The Pope's Exorcist (2023): Throat Goats
|
Oct 27, 2026 |
|
Ep. 135 - SAW (2004): We Had Fun in the Saw Trap
|
Oct 13, 2026 |
|
Ep. 134 - Hush (2016): Flock of Siegals
|
Oct 06, 2026 |
|
Ep. 133 - The Warriors (1979): Street Fiends
|
Sep 29, 2026 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - Avatar (2009): MILF or GILF?
|
Sep 22, 2026 |
|
Ep.132 - The Little Shop of Horrors (1960): The Phantom of Oklahoma
|
Sep 15, 2026 |
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Ep. 131 - Mythica: The Iron Crown (2016): Ernest goes to Mythica
|
Sep 08, 2026 |
|
Ep. 130 - White Bird in a Blizzard (2014): Jordan's Monkey's Paw
|
Sep 01, 2026 |
|
Ep. 129 - Night of the Comet (1984): Zombunism
|
Aug 25, 2026 |
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Ep. 128 - Repo Man (1984): Burnin' trash with grandpa
|
Aug 18, 2026 |
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Ep. 127 - The Thing From Another World (1951): We Blew the Budget
|
Aug 11, 2026 |
|
Ep. 126 - Psycho Goreman (2020): Robot Angel T*ts
|
Aug 04, 2026 |
|
Ep. 125 - The Hunt (2020): Everybody has a bread knife these days
|
Jul 28, 2026 |
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Ep. 124 - Event Horizon (1997): Butt Rock Futurism
|
Jul 21, 2026 |
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Ep. 123 - Saint Maud (2019): Self-Immolation is Badass
|
Jul 14, 2026 |
|
Ep. 122 - Color Out of Space (2019): The cat drained my tension balls
|
Jul 07, 2026 |
|
Ep. 121 - Beatdown Rewind: Four Sides to a Cube
|
Jun 30, 2026 |
|
Ep. 120 - Cube (2021): She was the Mark Cuban the Whole Time
|
Jun 23, 2026 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - S.W.A.T. (2003): Pop quiz hotshot!
|
Jun 16, 2026 |
|
Ep.119 - Bloodsucking Bastards (2015): Sea of Monotony
|
Jun 09, 2026 |
|
Ep. 118 - Wolfcop (2014): We Say "Wolfcop" 73 Times
|
Jun 02, 2026 |
|
Ep. 117 - Monkey Shines (1988): He Stanley'd her Tucci
|
May 26, 2026 |
|
Ep. 116 - Day of the Dead (1985): Hooked on Phonics
|
May 19, 2026 |
|
Ep. 115 - Martin (1977): Release the Goblin cut
|
May 12, 2026 |
|
Ep. 114 - The Crazies (1973): Col. Pecker
|
May 05, 2026 |
|
Ep. 113 - Chupacabra: Dark Seas (2005): Dr. Penis
|
Apr 28, 2026 |
|
Ep. 112 - Mythica: The Necromancer (2015): Does Anybody Else Miss Regis Philbin?
|
Apr 21, 2026 |
|
Ep. 111 - Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels (1998): It's Like Stolen Valour
|
Apr 14, 2026 |
|
Ep. 110 Cube Zero (2004): Nobody Takes the Gemini Seriously
|
Apr 07, 2026 |
|
Ep. 109 - Malibu Express (1985): That was the icky bad one
|
Mar 31, 2026 |
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Ep. 108 - Grizzly II: Revenge (1983/2020): We're not bearologists
|
Mar 24, 2026 |
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Ep. 107 Tremors II: Aftershocks (1996): Bipedal chicken nugget
|
Mar 17, 2026 |
|
Ep. 106 - Barb Wire (1996): I just want Liam Neeson to be happy
|
Mar 10, 2026 |
|
Ep. 105 Grizzly (1976): They can smell the menstruation!
|
Mar 03, 2026 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009): Open containers and concepts
|
Feb 24, 2026 |
|
Ep. 104 Strike Commando (1987): Jakota Dohnson
|
Feb 17, 2026 |
|
Ep. 103 - Raiders of the Sun (1992): You're not gonna get laid in a yellow vest
|
Feb 10, 2026 |
|
Ep. 102 - Mortuary (1982): Bill Paxton was at the Kennedy assassination??
|
Feb 03, 2026 |
|
Ep. 101 The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974): Leatherface has feelings and dreams too
|
Jan 27, 2026 |
|
Ep. 100 - The First Annual Beaty's Part II
|
Jan 20, 2026 |
|
Ep. 99 Mythica: The Darkspore: (2015): They poop themselves sometimes
|
Jan 13, 2026 |
|
Ep. 98 Mythica: A Quest for Heroes (2014): We're in the dark ages of CGI
|
Jan 06, 2026 |
|
A more special message from Jordan
|
Dec 30, 2025 |
|
Ep. 97 Bloodbeat (1983): C*MCON 4
|
Dec 23, 2025 |
|
A Special Message from Pete
|
Dec 16, 2025 |
|
Ep. 96 Summer of 84 (2018): It's like a sad handjob
|
Dec 09, 2025 |
|
Ep. 95 - Picasso Trigger (1988): CHiPs or Chippendales?
|
Dec 02, 2025 |
|
Ep. 94 House of 1000 Corpses (2003): It's a daddy apron
|
Nov 25, 2025 |
|
Ep. 93 Brain Damage (1988): Brain Cream Pie
|
Nov 11, 2025 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - The Predator (2018): The Lakers Predator
|
Nov 11, 2025 |
|
Ep. 92 The Toxic Avenger (2023): #Magnetowasright
|
Nov 04, 2025 |
|
Ep. 91 - The VVitch (2015): It's pronounced Guinevere
|
Oct 28, 2025 |
|
Ep. 90 Bionicle: Mask of Light (2003) We brought in an expert
|
Oct 21, 2025 |
|
Ep. 89 Space Mutiny (1988): The year of the Reb
|
Oct 14, 2025 |
|
Ep. 88 Bitch Slap (2009): Do it for Lucy
|
Oct 07, 2025 |
|
Ep. 87 Robowar (1988): Wow! We all had the same score!
|
Sep 30, 2025 |
|
Ep. 86 Kraken: Tentacles of the Deep (2006): The movie formally known as Kraken
|
Sep 23, 2025 |
|
Ep. 85 Sisu (2022): ...In Minecraft
|
Sep 16, 2025 |
|
Ep. 84 Faster, Pussy Cat! Kill! Kill! (1965): The male leer
|
Sep 09, 2025 |
|
Ep. 83 Never Too Young to Die (1986): The one where John Stamos got groomed
|
Sep 02, 2025 |
|
Ep. 82 Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe (1991): Abraxas is a bisexual icon
|
Aug 26, 2025 |
|
Ep. 81 Critters (1986): Sweet baby boy Billy
|
Aug 19, 2025 |
|
A big Midwestern ope
|
Aug 13, 2025 |
|
Ep. 80 Halloween II (1981): It's pronounced Samhain
|
Aug 05, 2025 |
|
Ep. 79 Bride of Re-Animator (1990): Junk drawer of body parts
|
Jul 29, 2025 |
|
Ep. 78 Pythons 2 (2002): Apparently, there was two snakes
|
Jul 22, 2025 |
|
Ep. 77 The Toxic Avenger Part 2 (1989): Long pig ramen
|
Jul 15, 2025 |
|
Ep. 76 The Blair Witch Project (1999): I'm gonna go boneless
|
Jul 08, 2025 |
|
Ep. 75 El Mariachi (1992): Couch cushion budget
|
Jul 01, 2025 |
|
Ep. 74 The Void (2016): Parliament: Special Victims Unit
|
Jun 24, 2025 |
|
Ep. 73 The Stepfather (1987): We saw Terry O'Quinn's peepee
|
Jun 17, 2025 |
|
Ep. 72 Rubber (2010): Peter was my Dick (Grayson)
|
Jun 10, 2025 |
|
Ep. 71 Ice Cream man (1995): Icecream men should have a union
|
Jun 03, 2025 |
|
Ep. 70 Deathgasm (2015): Pete's last episode
|
May 27, 2025 |
|
Ep. 69 Cube 2: Hypercube (2002): The Jerry food chain
|
May 20, 2025 |
|
Ep. 68 Mad Max (1979): The Hemsworth touch of death
|
May 13, 2025 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - The Mask of Zorro (1998) Cinco De Masko
|
May 06, 2025 |
|
Ep. 67 Defendor (2009): D*cks out for Dustin
|
Apr 28, 2025 |
|
Ep. 66 - Under Lock and Key (1995): Triathlon of smut
|
Apr 22, 2025 |
|
Ep. 65 - Bikini Spring Break (2012): Our first, and probably our last Asylum film.
|
Apr 14, 2025 |
|
Ep. 64 - Proxima (2019): Space Horses
|
Apr 07, 2025 |
|
Ep. 63 - Money Plane (2020): Where's the nip slip, Jordan?
|
Mar 31, 2025 |
|
Ep. 62 - Fist of Fury (1972): Thems fightin' words
|
Mar 24, 2025 |
|
Ep. 61 - The Raid: Redemption (2011): That's when he sh*t his pants
|
Mar 17, 2025 |
|
Ep. 60 - Bloodsport (1988): ...But he's not a lazy guy.
|
Mar 10, 2025 |
|
Ep. 59 - Kung Pow! Enter the Fist (2002): How the f*ck did this get made?
|
Mar 03, 2025 |
|
Ep. 58 - Victor Crowley (2017): That's how they got Sully!
|
Feb 24, 2025 |
|
Ep. 57 - My Bloody Valentine (1981): Cannibalistic constituents
|
Feb 17, 2025 |
|
Ep. 56 - C.H.U.D. (1984): First appearance of John Goodman
|
Feb 10, 2025 |
|
Ep. 55 - Wizards (1977): Weehawk tuah
|
Feb 03, 2025 |
|
Ep. 54 - Slaxx (2020): The Brett Brothers
|
Jan 27, 2025 |
|
Ep. 53 - Puppet Master II (1990): "Contributions"
|
Jan 20, 2025 |
|
Ep. 52 Navy SEALs Vs. Zombies (2015): Navy SEAL Body
|
Jan 13, 2025 |
|
Ep. 51 - Re-Animator (1985): Duder-agonist
|
Jan 06, 2025 |
|
Ep. 50 - The First Annual Beatys: Stroke of Genius
|
Dec 30, 2024 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - Gremlins (1984): Over-bush
|
Dec 23, 2024 |
|
Ep. 49 - Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988): The fourth Beastie Boy
|
Dec 09, 2024 |
|
Ep. 48 - Hatchet 3 (2013): A Schwan's Song
|
Dec 02, 2024 |
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The Beatys: 12 Days of Beatdown
|
Nov 30, 2024 |
|
Ep. 47 - ThanksKilling (2008): P*rnhub.gov
|
Nov 25, 2024 |
|
Ep. 46 - Guns (1990): Reverse Bechdel test
|
Nov 18, 2024 |
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Ep. 45 - Hell Baby (2013): Put the lotion away
|
Nov 11, 2024 |
|
Ep. 44 - Galaxy of Terror (1981): So many buttholes
|
Nov 04, 2024 |
|
Ep. 43 - Friday the 13th: Part 2 (1981): Jason takes Ellis Island
|
Oct 28, 2024 |
|
Ep. 42 - Dead Air (2009): Pete's a classy broad
|
Oct 21, 2024 |
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Ep. 41 - Wishmaster (1997): What's your favorite Robert Williams movie?
|
Oct 14, 2024 |
|
Ep. 40 - Cube (1997): Mathematics and bullsh*t
|
Oct 07, 2024 |
|
Ep. 39 - Dinosaur Island (1994): We've got boobs at home
|
Sep 30, 2024 |
|
Ep. 38 - Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023): The passion of the Christopher Robin
|
Sep 23, 2024 |
|
Ep. 37 - Yeti: Curse of the Snow Demon (2008): We swear we're not virgins
|
Sep 16, 2024 |
|
Ep. 36 - Surf II (1983): F*** Grease
|
Sep 09, 2024 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - The Karate Kid (1984): Cobra Kais are "bad"
|
Sep 02, 2024 |
|
Ep. 35 - Wet Hot American Summer (2001): F*** the critics
|
Aug 26, 2024 |
|
Ep. 34 - Sleepaway Camp II: Unhappy Campers (1988): A moment of silence for the sh*t sisters
|
Aug 19, 2024 |
|
Ep. 33 - Meatballs (1979): Blow up my skirt
|
Aug 12, 2024 |
|
Ep. 32 - The Burning (1981): Just starfish
|
Aug 05, 2024 |
|
Ep. 31 - Silent Night Deadly Night Part 2 (1987): GaRbAge dAY
|
Jul 29, 2024 |
|
Ep. 30 - Hatchet 2 (2010): Another Thursday night
|
Jul 22, 2024 |
|
Ep. 29 - Hatchet (2006): There's your Thursday night
|
Jul 15, 2024 |
|
Ep. 28 - The VelociPastor (2017): Dino-ing out
|
Jul 08, 2024 |
|
Ep. 27 - The Room (2003): The 13 year-old theory
|
Jul 01, 2024 |
|
Ep. 26 - Metamorphosis: The Alien Factor (1990): Are we alone?
|
Jun 24, 2024 |
|
Ep. 25 - Prison Ship: Star Slammer (1986): Weapons-grade cleavage
|
Jun 17, 2024 |
|
Ep. 24 - Tremors (1990): This one's for us
|
Jun 10, 2024 |
|
Ep. 23 - Death Race 2000 (1975): A smidge of bush
|
Jun 03, 2024 |
|
Ep. 22 - Tromeo & Juliet (1996): Tromatize me, cap'n
|
May 27, 2024 |
|
Ep. 21 - Surf Nazis Must Die (1987): Dollar store droogs
|
May 20, 2024 |
|
Ep. 20 - Class of Nuke 'Em High (1986): Magnum c*m loudly
|
May 13, 2024 |
|
Ep. 19 - Sgt. Kabukiman N.Y.P.D. (1990): Penis-wielding imbeciles
|
May 06, 2024 |
|
Ep. 18 - Neon Maniacs (1986): The Village People of monsters
|
Apr 29, 2024 |
|
Ep. 17 - Evil Bong (2006): It's a lateral move
|
Apr 22, 2024 |
|
Ep. 16 - Willy's Wonderland (2021): Is he gonna f*** the pinball machine?
|
Apr 15, 2024 |
|
Ep. 15 - It Came From Beneath the Sea (1955): A history lesson in VFX
|
Apr 08, 2024 |
|
Blockbuster Beatdown - Jurassic Park (1993): Sixty-five million dollars ago
|
Apr 01, 2024 |
|
Ep. 14 - Clerks (1994): Thirty seven is kind of a lot
|
Mar 25, 2024 |
|
Ep. 13 - Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987): She's checkin' his oil!
|
Mar 18, 2024 |
|
Ep. 12 - Hobo With a Shotgun(2011): It feels good to laugh
|
Mar 11, 2024 |
|
Ep. 11 - Shadow Warriors(1997-1999): Two for the price of one
|
Mar 04, 2024 |
|
Ep. 10 - Halloween (1978): Big trouble in little childhood
|
Feb 26, 2024 |
|
Ep. 9 - Mercenary Fighters (1988): Resting pissed face
|
Feb 19, 2024 |
|
Ep. 8 - The Evil Dead (1981): Perfect. One note...
|
Feb 12, 2024 |
|
Ep. 7 - Suspiria (1977): Not to be crass...
|
Feb 05, 2024 |
|
Ep. 6 - Python (2000): You know what? F*** John.
|
Jan 29, 2024 |
|
Ep. 5 - Hercules in New York (1969): Arnie's ouvwah
|
Jan 22, 2024 |
|
Ep. 4 - Chopping Mall (1986): Send 'em a rambogram
|
Jan 15, 2024 |
|
Ep. 3 - Frankenhooker (1990): Misunderstood and unholy
|
Jan 08, 2024 |
|
Ep. 2 - Troll 2 (1990): Munchin' the cob
|
Jan 01, 2024 |
|
Ep. 1 - The Toxic Avenger (1984): Flickin' it
|
Jan 01, 2024 |
|
Ep. 0 - Introduction: Rapier wit
|
Dec 30, 2023 |